• Greetings, true believers and newcomers alike. This is AmeriKuri: Redux!

    SUMMARY

    Let's face it. For the most part, life is boring. We all wish something exiting would happen, anything to shatter the monotony. Well, for Andrew, that's about to happen. Out of nowhere, the proverbial Vespa-riding woman has CPR'd and Rickenbacker-smashed her way into his unsuspecting life and made things a living hell - in a good way. Pros? He has a robot and an uber-hot anime-esque chick living with him. The girl seems to have the hots for him, too. Cons? Random crap is coming out of his forehead, and those of us who have seen FLCL know that Haruko is up to something. So, sit back and enjoy the show. Give it a chance, will you? It gets better after the first 2 chapters. I promise. Read, review, and above all, have fun.

    Episode one: Whether the Weather

    (o.o)Episode One, Chapter one: Beginning of the End(o.o)

    -Nothing ever happens here. Everything is ordinary. Every day we spend here is like a whole lifetime of dying slowly...uh...never mind. That's kinda sadistic. I mean yeah, it's boring, but I'm pretty sure it's not as bad as, you know, death. Whatever.-

    -Life in Indiana. Dull. Duller than a...well, it's really, really dull. It won't be making the top 10 vacation destinations anytime soon. Lots of big corporations have been building in our city. Starbucks, Wal-Mart, Best Buy...I think we even have a Disneyland coming in soon. But the biggest thing by far is, about 2 years ago, the government informed the town that construction of a large factory would begin immediately. It would supply many job openings, top-notch salary, great hours, and free booze.-

    -I think it's the booze that dragged the town in.-

    -When the government says immediately, they mean it. The factory was built overnight, and when the people saw it, they discovered it was shaped like a huge iron. It was christened the good ship MedMech. The thing about it is that every day, at almost the same time, insane amounts of white smoke billow out of it, almost like it's trapping us in the town, saying "Yeah right, dumbass. You're not going anywhere."-

    -The adults went crazy with joy. They cavorted about town, getting drunk, sniffing rocks, tipping cows and hobos...pretty much doing everything they tell teenagers NOT to do.-

    -Adults are really stupid.-

    Andrew groaned. He wanted to sleep. So he rolled over and tried to go back to sleep. It didn't work.

    "That stupid dream again..." he mumbled to himself. Every day for the past few weeks, he'd been having thiss one seriously effed-up dream over and over and over again. It was the same thing every time.

    -A woman on a Vespa, swinging a guitar.-

    -A shining red robot, locked in combat with something.-

    -A schoolhouse on fire.-

    -Cat ears.-

    -A sattelite hurtling towards a bustling city.-

    -A massive phoenix thing carrying a factory shaped like an iron.-

    He tried sleep again. Groan, roll, sleep. Groan, roll, sleep. Lather, rinse, repeat. Andrew snorted and stood up, causing innumerable stuffed penguins to roll off his bed. It was oddly cold in his room. It wasn't cold enough for Andrew, though. He scanned the walls of his room for the thermostat, his eyes passing over various anime and other nerdy-like posters covering his room like wallpaper. "Bwar." he said, giving up in his search for the thermostat. "Bwar", he said again, because "Bwar" was just fun to say. He untangled himself from his bedding, put on clean clothes, and headed downstairs.

    Normally, his mother would have bellowed up the stairs, telling him to get dressed for school. But his parents and Lucifer-incarnate brother were in Florida right now. Andrew was supposed to have gone with them, but after a solid month of "If I die from heat stroke or get eaten by alligators, d'you have any idea what kind of emotional agony you'll go through?", his parents had allowed him to stay home. As lethargy gripped his being while traversing the stairs, his mind wandered to the dream he had. A huge, glowing red bird coming out of someone's forehead. It was the same dream he had last night. And the night before that. And every night since - he tried to think of an event that happened about the same time the dreams started - since they build that bigass factory. He contemplated seeing a psychologist...nah. The doc would just end up running out of his office in tears again.

    He reached the kitchen, opened the freezer, and pulled out a frozen ice-cream-sundae flavored Pop-Tart. Pure bliss. The hell with whoever says sugar isn't for breakfast. As he munched on the tasty treat, his eyes wandered to the back door, where a white thing was five feet up the screen door. Upon closer inspection it was Andrew's kitten, Yuna.

    "Get off the door, Yuna."

    ...stares

    "Yuna, get off the door before I get the water."

    ...stares

    "YUNA..."

    ...meoooow?

    "GODDAMMIT KITTY GET OFF THE DAMN DOOR OR IMMA KICK YOUR KITTY a** KITTY!"

    ...meow?

    "...whatever..."

    Andrew's bout with the cat was over, and he still had a few minutes to watch tv. He flipped it on and clicked through all 500-some channels. Nothing. Abso-freakin-lutely nothing. Andrew groaned some more, then slung his bookbag over his shoulder and headed out. Since he was out the door, he was unable to hear the weather. It was a new weatherperson, a woman with bright pink hair and piercing yellow eyes...

    "...high of 75 today, low of 62, it's clear and sunny right now, but later today it'll be partly cloudy with a chance of FLCL..."