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On Wednesday, I remember walking with her to her class while I had a free period. She looked pretty happy. Right after school today, she looked even happier while sitting with him. I didn't feel like I belonged. Kiyoshi and I walked over to the piano rooms, passing my awesome English teacher who may be reading this right now. I had to pass a little time; it was not worth being tied down, thinking about those two.
Finally, I was home, and I wanted to give my dream one more try. Entering the old world felt almost immediate, yet, it also felt incomplete. There they were, in the car once again. Kotori, Kiyoshi, and of course, I was there too. Someone else was here too, I thought to myself. Of course! How could I have forgotten about her?
“Hey Kiyoshi, Kotori, where is she,” I said, sounding a bit worried.
“Bro, are you alright? We've been the only ones here all day. We just got back into the car after hitting the mall for a few hours,” Kiyoshi said to me, but I knew he was wrong.
“Maybe she's still buying something at the mall! Don't we need to give her a ride home,” I insisted. My friends seemed sure that there was no one else with us today. Could I have been in the wrong world again? I do not understand why she wasn't there. For the past few days, we talked in the same spot. If she is gone, then why am I dreaming? I wanted to wake up. I had enough.
“Hey, you're not talking about her are you? Don't you remember, she had a date with him today. It's that special day,” Kotori told me. That was when I realized she was still in this world. She was in this world, but not with the dreamer. So, this is what I get for doing the right thing. One of my best friends and the girl I treasured the most are together because of me. Now, in my own dreams, she spends her time with him. I had enough.
“Do you realize what you're doing,” the voice said.
“You again?!” I exclaimed into the air. “What do you want from me? Look, I just want her back. I did everything I had to in the real world, giving my dreams to him, but why can't you even let me spend time with her in my dreams? Who are you?!”
“Has it not occurred to you who I am? You and I are one person. I guide you through the narrow paths, the uphill climb, and the darkness that surrounds you. You, we, have pushed her away. After all the time you spent with her and all the things you've done for her, you're throwing it all away this easily? Stop pushing her away. Yes, she probably is happy with him, but that does not mean that the future is sealed to one fate. You know this because I know this, because we are one; this world changes and futures do too. Our efforts are not wasted as long as we make a man out of ourselves in the end. Treat her as if nothing has changed, and she will return. Push her away as if she is no longer the person she once was, and she will disappear,” says he, no, I.
For once, I wake up peacefully. Using this knowledge I learned from within myself, I wander through the many paths I could take once again. What could this have to do with the memory of 7th grade that I had earlier today? Did I really have a chance with her still? Does the future really have a chance of changing? Was I really pushing her away, and how do I return to how things once were? So many questions are left unanswered, but there is no one person that can answer these questions with complete correctness. I guess it is up to me, guiding myself through whatever obstacles come my way. Thanks voice. I guess you really are there when I need you.
- by OfficialSaichi |
- Non Fiction
- | Submitted on 07/12/2012 |
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- Title: Realization Within a Dream
- Artist: OfficialSaichi
- Description: I have written out many of my dreams in the past; this is somewhere towards the end of one "theme" within my dreams.
- Date: 07/12/2012
- Tags: realization dream
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