had an awfull dream last night....I dreamed that my brother was following me and was trying to get prove that I had a girlfriend (which I did in the dream)....can't remember much of what she looked like but she was hot ^_^
the worst part was that he told father and he was furious....he forbide me from seeing the girl again (sounds familiar?)after that I was left in a state of being mostly asleep but aware that I was in pain.....this was about (a rought estimate....) 3-4 in the morning.....I was in so much pain....my body was....and then she came to mind for less then a second and the pain doubled.....I remember falling asleep again....this all must have happened in seconds 'cause I feel back to sleep but even in my second dream I could still feel the pain and the same feeling that I had yesterday.....the feeling of just wanting to cry for hours or until I have no more tears.....
I woke up some hours latter and everything was fine....my body had left no trace of pain (which is weird because it usually does)....and I was ok for most of the morning......until I remembered the dream and I asked my pendulum about it.....I didn't really liked the answers that I was getting so I did the only stupid thing I could think of.....I took out the same letter that I had read yesterday and re-read it again....maybe I was looking for something......I don't know why I read it but I did......though this time it gave me the feeling of indifference.....strange....on her b-day...I seem to be thinking more and more about her......all I really want to do is be far from the idea that a year ago today she wasn't in that place....*sigh*
elly called this morning.....I was so thankfull for that 'cause I could feel myself going back to my other state of mind....she brought me back to my usual one without knowing it.....then she started talking about this game.....it must be a fun game.
while she talked about her game my mind had wandered off again (as it usually does after I ask the pendulum something)....I remember thinking that just one more question wouldn't hurt and before I knew it I was playing a game of 21 questions.....I hope she didn't noticed that I was talking to it whenever I got frustrated or that I had choked and held back tears after some of the answers that it gave me.......funny.....it's 12 right now and look at all the stuff that happened.
I think we are gonna go to work around midnight ^_^ (those are my type of hours).
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this is funny *looks at the image below*....I took a test on what I need in my life and well.....some of the stuff it say is....right.....*blink*...it's depressing lol
<img src="http://images.quizilla.com/P/PainfulBliss/1115499360_A_loyal.JPG" border="0" alt="Loyal"><br>You need someone loyal.<br>People have let you down since forever and you<br>have always been left by yourself. Your life<br>spark is now barely flickering and there is a<br>big feeling of emptiness and hopelessness. You<br>don't know what to do anymore in your life and<br>everything has a sense of meaningless to it.<br>Though you're not only sad, you also carry hate<br>and many grudges on people. You have a hard<br>time letting people in, but with your history<br>you don't even desire that so much anymore.
<br>
<img src="http://images.quizilla.com/P/PainfulBliss/1115498784_A_friends.JPG" border="0" alt="Friends"><br>You need friends.<br>You have been very lonely in your life and<br>people have, for one reason or another, stayed<br>away from you. The isolation is killing you<br>inside and all you want is to feel a connection<br>with somebody else. You now have little<br>self-esteem left inside and have dark thoughts<br>about life and relationships. However you still<br>have that crave of friends inside of you, even<br>if you won't admit that to yourself anymore.<br>And even if you do have a friend, you still<br>feel lonely because you have a hard time<br>letting people in since you have been isolated<br>so long.
<br>
<img src="http://images.quizilla.com/P/PainfulBliss/1105879328_Carig_soul.JPG" border="0" alt="Caring soul"><br><b>Your soul is caring.</b><br>Other people are your concern, even if you<br>don't know them. If you see a person trip you<br>worry is he is okay. You put your loved ones<br>first and you're very mature. When someones<br>sick you're nurturing and always try to help<br>family and friends when failure strikes them.<br>You can be called the motherly one, if you are<br>in a group of people, which doesn't have to be<br>bad. Love is something that's already in you<br>and you have a lot to give whether you believe<br>it or not. Your friends probably love you very<br>much and come to when they need help since<br>you're reliable. People can feel secure with<br>you and generally like you.
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today is your b-day and theres nothing I can do....no smiles and happy words will be exchanged between us because our bond has been forcefully broken.
I regret the moment I questioned your state of mind and hope for it all to be a lie....yet I'll never know.
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it's been decided that I'm doing that job thingy on monday (he forgot to take the measurements and I can't cut without knowing them).....I'm feeling really hyper right now I have to check some pics that I took.....*looks at her mom* why did I agree to this?...oh yeah,I had no saying....lol.
uh...what was I gonna say?...oh yeah....I was in way to much pain today ^_^ it seemed to have switched times on me today.....it started 3 hours earlier than usual ^_^.... rofl this pics are funny......thats it for now...bye 3nodding
AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NATURE WAS RIGHT!!!!!!!!!! I AM WATER(I thought I was fire)!!!!!!! O_O she's good 3nodding
<img src="http://images.quizilla.com/P/PainfulBliss/1112623873_er.Element.JPG" border="0" alt="Water element"><br>Your element is Water. You have a calm aura around<br>you and are in tune with the world around. You<br>observe it but rarely interfere. Because of<br>your shy and timid nature you will not have so<br>many friends in your life. But then again,<br>large crowds aren't your thing anyway. You are<br>comfortable on your own and are reserved to<br>others who you don't know or know very little<br>of. You know everyone out there does not want<br>to be your friend, and knowing that is good.<br>However, people who don't know you that well<br>thinks that you are cold and distant since you<br>don't want to talk to them. Although you mean<br>no harm, you can't always be perfectly<br>understood in the world. No one can. Life in<br>general are you quite serene with even if there<br>are some things you don't like. Your love-life<br>is not so full of boys/girls, but if you<br>flirted more with the ones you were interested<br>in I'm sure something would happen. The hobbies<br>you choose are calmer ones, you are no party<br>girl that likes to drink and make-out with<br>three or more guys/girls in one night. Reading<br>a book or swimming is more your thing. Rate and<br>message!
Your power is:</b> Being a controller of an<br>element
Explanation:</b> Wether it is earth, fire,<br>air or water or even all of them, you can<br>control that element. That means you can<br>manipulate their pysichal form and with just<br>thoughts and make an inferno for example. In<br>good purposes it can be used to protect but in<br>evil purposes it is used to hurt.<br>As a person you are slightly 'odd'. People see<br>you as different and probably has prejudices<br>against you. They see you as 'weird' or the<br>'freak', and either that hurts really much or<br>you chose to ignore it. You keep your hatred<br>for people inside and probably daydream about<br>killing them, which gives you satisfaction.<br>Truth is you are not evil, only missunderstood<br>and mistreated.<br><b>Negative aspects:</b> Since you have deep<br>problems inside you could get into some sort of<br>mental illness or simply get depressed (if you<br>aren't already).
 yamiruri · Sat Jul 09, 2005 @ 05:07pm · 0 Comments |
