Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

1. Randomly throw bags of crap at him.
2. Buy a bunch of Sasuke plushies off of E-Bay and leave them in his bed.
3. Put a remote controlled hot dog in his pants and everytime he walks past Sakura make it stand out!
4. Tie him up, strip him down to his boxers and leave him on the street. By tomorrow morning, he should be ripped to shreds.
5. Offer him beer 'till he's drunk, then spend the entire night ruining his social life!
6. Pretend you want to eat him. Follow him around with measuring tape and begin measuring him, then take a cook book out and pretend to read it. The next day, start sprinkling him with salt and other seasonings. The next day, follow him around with a knife and fork and whisper, "One more day..."
7. Repeadtedly ask him where his parents are.
8. Nudge him, wink, and say, "Going commando, eh?"
9. Make a very detailed Fugaku dummy and leave it on his door step with a note saying, "To: Sasuke, From: Itachi"
10. Sign him up for the circus!
11. While he's sleeping, glue his finger up his nose.

Like it? Well if you don't stop reading then. If you do:

12. Walk up to him and say, "I can pick you up!" then attempt to pick him up. Strain and grunt until you're blue in the face, then give up and shout, "Holy crap, you're a fat pig!"
13. Make a detailed Itachi dummy and pay a 3 year old to carry it past his house.
14. Call him, "Big Pimp Sasu-Sama!" every time you address him.
15. Tell him you're Itachi's wife/husband.
16. Shove constipated gerbils down his pants.
17. Try to rip his face off then say, "Oh my God! You're really that ugly!"
18. Constantly pat his stomach and ask, "Looks like the baby's gonna be coming any day now! When's it supposed to be due?"
19. Mispronounce his last name as "poochiha".
20: Everytime you see him, laugh and point until you pass out.

And the list continues:

21. Sneak up on Itachi one night then knock him out. Tie him up and lock him in your basement. Tell Sasuke that his brother is at your house. When Sasuke asks to have him, tell him he has to dress up as Sakura and do a duet singing, "My Hips don't Lie".
22. After he agrees to do the duet with you, tell him afterwards he has to do another duet. This time with him dressing up as Ken and singing, "I'm a Barbie Girl".
23. Tell him he has to do ONE MORE duet. This time he must dress up as Jack Dawson and act out the final scene from "Titanic" while you sing "My Heart Will Go On" in the background.
24. Tell him he must redo "I'm a Barbie Girl" in Hollywood. This time in Dutch.
25. Tape all the duets he's done with you and put them online.
26. Tell him that, unfortunately he has to do another duet. This time he must dress up as Brick Tamlan and sing "Afternoon Delight".
27. After he's done all this and asks for Itachi, tell him that he died of starvation in your basement.
28. Actually, Itachi is still alive, you lied. Let Itachi free and give him Sasuke's exact coordinates. Then show him all the duets you two did.
29. Comment on how his Uchiha fan resembles a bloody, inflated tampon.
30. Call him Itachi.

Only 15 more:

31. Give him a stomach virus and laugh whenever he pukes.
32. Make him cough in a bottle when he's sick and lable it "From: Sasuke To: Itachi" and leave it on Itachi's doorstep.
33. Screw around with his satellite until the only channel that will come in is PBS.
34. Spike his water.
35. Walk behind him and constantly throw balls over his head then yell, "Fetch!" Repeat every 4-5 minutes.
36. Dress up as a policeman and say, "Shouldn't you be on a leash?"
37. Buy him a goldfish and when it dies pat him on the shoulder and say "It's okay hunny. Everything has to die sometime".
38. Ask him how his goldfish is.
39. While he's sleeping, fill his kitchen with tomatoes and post a sticky note to his head that says, "I heard you like tomatoes so..."

And here's the top five!

40. Paint his nails pink while he's asleep, then comment on them in front of everyone.
41. Sign him up to play the part of "toddler" on Huggies commercials.
42. Download "Peanut Butter Jelly Time" on your iPod (if you don't have an iPod, then record it on a tape recorder) then put it on repeat. Hide it in his underwear drawer.
43. On Valentine's Day, leave three notes on his door:
A. "I have always admired you! From: Haku"
B. "Even though we tried to kill you, don't think we don't love you! From: Itachi and Kisame"
C. "Dear Sasuke, Please wear those tight leather jeans today. From: Naruto"
(Remember to leave all three!)
44. Hot glue vampires fangs to his mouth, then glue a shirt on hims that says, "Caution! I bite."

And the number one way to annoy Sasuke Uchiha:
45. Recreate Konoha to look like Teletubby land. Then kick everyone out and pay Sasuke haters to dress up as Teletubbies. Wait till he wakes up then create a never ending episode of Teletubbies!