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Locked Away - Chapter 1 - Sing in Silence for Me |
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"Sir Nathan." The most familiar and intimidating voice greeted my ears, making me look up from the photo album I was perusing through in a trance like state. I was met with the sight of a tall woman with fair colored skin and the most entrancing blue eyes, much more beautiful than my two toned ones. Her white blonde hair was pulled back into its normal bun, "I was expecting more from you." She pulled the album from my hands, "The top fighter in the guild, becoming soft. It makes me disappointed in you."
"Much apologies, my Queen." I replied to her. I glanced down to my other albums again and closed them. "But there's nothing I can do about it. I'm only seventeen for christ's sake. My mother needs me more than ever. Especially now." I told her as I put the albums in the cardboard box in front of me.
"I am fully aware of this situation, Miss Nathaina." She drew out my real name making me cringe and touch my cheek as if I had been slapped. Which, emotionally, I had been.
"Quit that!" I snapped at her, eyes narrowed and teeth bared like a rabid beast of some sort. "Stop calling me by that name! I hate that name! I am not weak and worthless like the other women. I shall take no pride in my womanhood!" My heart cinched in fury as she just smirked at me, and examined her nails in a bored way.
"You know that you are to attend the ceremony, right?" She completely changed the subject, still wearing that sadistic smile that I've picked up on.
"Paul told me, yes." I replied and struggled to control my temper. My fists felt like beating something up, and the urge had grown with my rage at being reminded of all that was trained and abused out of me: my feminism, as well as my childhood.
"Who is escorting you?" She asked looking at me curiously, "Paul, again, I suppose."
"Sir Paul has agreed to accompany me to this ceremony." I stated in a bored sigh, "If you think about it, its rather traditional, him and I." She just smiled at me.
"Of course. Who could forget that particular tradition? Everyone has always questioned your sexual preference, you know." She just loved seeing me mad. I owed her my life, so there was nothing I could do about it. "You never show interest in anyone, male or female."
"I have no room for the love of either." I retorted, "You can thank my stupid father for that."
"We've showed him as much thanks as we are willing to." She said with a frown, "That man is dead the next time he comes within a hundred yards of this family."
"I wish my mother would believe that we had the power to stop this, but she still thinks we all are just kids." I huffed and went back to packing all of my belongings.
"Even though the youngest in this guild is you." She walked to my closet and picked up the pauldron from the box, examining the armor, then searching through the rest of the metal pieces. "Is Lady Tennia still repairing the breastplate?" She asked, looking at me, black alloy shin guard in her slender hands.
"Yes, Sir Paul and Sir Grimm are supposed to bring it by here in a little while." I gave a quick glance to the opened window that was letting a cool, soothing breath of air into the room, then resumed packing. I crawled under my bed to clean out the trash and clutter from there while the Queen, as we called her, the lower ranked, since we didn't really know her real name, searched through my closet and pulled everything out. She was good at sorting things, though why she was helping me pack was a complete mystery. I snorted at the thought of her wanting me gone.
I was the best fighter in this "guild", as she called it. Though, my initiation was quite difficult considering I was up against the whole gang by myself. Thirty against one is highly unfair, but I didn't go to the hospital alone by the end of the week. Sir Paul, Lady Helena, and even the Queen were surprised I made it until the last day to collapse from my wounds and exhaustion. They held my Ceremony of Acceptance two weeks later when I refused to stay in the hospital for the full month. My armor kept me together that night. I have never seen so many people, or felt so many backslaps in my life.
Also, I had never been questioned about my gender and sexuality so many times. I couldn't even answer the second question. I've never had any interest for anyone like that. Sure, I should be attracted to men because I'm, unfortunately, a woman. However, I'm just not interested, and liking women is just uncormfortable to think about.
I guess being my dad's little experiment is the cause of this. Henry never wanted a female child. He wanted a good stong line of male offspring so they could just the military, or army, or whatever it was that I was prepped for. But when my mother gave birth to me, then had so many miscarriages, he tried to turn me into the son he never got.
"Sir Nathan..." The Queen looked around for me, but didn't realize I was spacing out under the bed.
"Under here!" I called and I could hear her chuckle lightly.
"Sir Paul is here." She said with amusement in her voice, "Be respectful and greet him."
My heart swelled with happiness at this news and I scrambled as fast as I could to get out into the open again. I made myself calm down out of habit, but I smiled at him when he offered his hand to help me up.
"Sir Nathan, its good to see you again." He smirked as I kneeled down before him, as is common for the lower ranking to do as a sign of respect.
"Sir Paul," I greeted, standing up, "How's that cut scarring along?" I asked, concern sweeping over me. I relaxed when he gave a curt chuckle and patted his chest.
"It's fine. The pain was gone the second day." He grinned in his smug little way.
"Liar!" I laughed, knowing that he was pretending to be too tough for pain.
"Eh. Well, The pain is gone somewhat. Ma says I need to take it easy still." He replied with a good natured sigh.
I frowned at him, recalling the panic that rushed through us all as we broke the speed limit by alot just to get him to the hospital, "That was a serious wound. I'm surprised we made it in time." I could see the blood pouring and mixing with the rain in some sort of second long flashback. "Are you sure you should even be out of bed. And where is Sir Grimm? You're not supposed to be out alone!" I lectured on accident, unable to stop myself.
"Gee, I'm fine, mom." He said, looking at me with a half smile.
I flinched visibly from that word. Mom. I could see in his eyes, the instant regret of saying that. He took a step forward while I stepped back and sat on my bed, slightly hurt for some odd, unknown reason.
Out of the corner of my eye I could see the Queen leave my room after setting my repaired breastplate back in the box with the rest of the Ceremonial Armor. Paul and I were left in silence as I kept replaying that word in my head.
"Hey. Look." Paul got nervous at what to say for just a moment, "Sorry. I should control my mouth."
He sat down beside me and ruffled my hair, which was short in the back and front except for a large bit that hung down to cover my right eye in the front. "I was worried about you too." He said with a sad sigh, "You are still covered in bandages." I looked at my arms and hands, finally remembering that I was hurt, not as fatally as he was, and that the wounds would surely scar.
"Speaking of..." I muttered as I saw one of the bandages red soaked through it. It was on my left bicep, and it wound jaggedly in a spiral until reached the bend of my elbow. I sighed as Paul followed my gaze to the bloody spot and I heard him sigh and gasp at the same time. I thought I saw his eyebrow twitch (he's very expressive). It must have been my imagination, however, as I stood up to get new gauze, tape, and antibiotic cream to smear on the gash.
Paul frowned as I removed the old, dirty wrapping. He poked at it, making me wince, and pus begin to drool out of the wound slowly.
"Huh." I said, indifferently, "Interesting."
"Interesting?" He practically shrieked in my pierced and gauged ears, "Its bloody infected! Did you even get checked out in the hospital?"
"Uh, no?" I gave him a look that asked if I was supposed to get checked out be a doctor. "Well, aside from all those people trying to figure out if I was a transvestite-"
"That's not what I meant, Nathan." His frown deepened.
"You're gonna get wrinkles at the ripe old age of twenty if you keep frowning and furrowing your eyebrows like that." I stated, but he just glared at me.
"We're going to the hospital." He said as he pulled me up.
"Ooooohhhhh no we're not!" I shook my head deffiantly.
I'll never admit to this, but I was deathly scared of those doctors. Everytime I was sitting in the emergency rooms, they'd enter, look at me and say "Soooo... Which gang was it this time?" It was very rude.
He continued to drag me out of the room, but I still fought to stay. I still needed to pack! "No! I hate doctors! I don't have the money for the bill! We haven't even re-bandaged this one!" I belted out excuses one after another. Paul just stopped and smirked at me. It was one of those devious, sadistic smirks. The kind I would never want to face in an alley, or hockey game, or something painful... Other than what I do. There he was, though, giving me the most devilish smirk I had ever seen and it made me gulp and it sent shivers down my spine.
Then I saw a hospital room's walls. Neat, white and surrounded by the smell of santizers and puke. I frowned, growled and gagged all at once. It came out choked sounding, but it was a growl nonetheless. I heard the doctor chuckle at me as I scanned the room with narrowed eyes. Paul was
so dead when I got a hold of him.
As I mentally cursed him in my head, I spotted him sitting in one of the chairs smiling. Just smiling at me as if everything was all good and well in the world. Smiling as if telling me "It wasn't my idea. So you can't do anything about it". Which meant that the Queen had it planned from the begining, and I am never redressing my wounds right in front of her ever again. Never ever ever! Not going to happen.
My cellphone rang and I raised an inquisitive eyebrow since the sound was coming from Paul. He answered quickly with a smirk, but in seconds that disappeared. He turned pallid and his beautiful brown eyes widened. I frowned, scared all of the sudden.
"Go, just go! Sh-she's in our care, Mrs. Parker. Just go." He stuttered out, and I paled too, my heart wrenching tightly in my chest as I felt the need to run out of the room and find my mother. "No, we'll get the things, just get the hell out of there! I have the address, yes. Yes, I'm the only one who knows about it. Please," He started to beg, his eyes tearing and I started to feel the stinging tears fall as I heard the one-sided conversation, "just leave." He hung up and pulled himself together, but his color remained pale and ghostly.
"He found her." He said, sounding choked as he tried not to cry, scream, run out, and punch things all at once.
Instantly the Queen had rushed from the other chair and was out of the building before anyone, including the doctor who looked scared too, could say a thing.
I, too, rose from the chair to be held back by the doctor. I turned, full of rage and fear, and glared so furiously at him that he let go right away. I bolted from the room and almost tripped on the stairs as I could not wait long enough for the sluggish elevators to arrive. I was taking the stairs three steps at a time and I cursed as I tripped and stumbled again and again but I was outside in no time wasted at all. I didn't wait for anyone to come get me, or to tell me to stop, I just hightailed it to my house which wasn't far from the dreaded hospital.
I was very athletic for someone my size, which was quite an advantage for me since people thought I was weaker and slower like all the other scrawny looking women, and I was quite fast. Being tall helped too, because I had a longer stride to lend its help.
I found myself at my door quickly and I burst into the house with rage flowing through my veins. But it wasn't for nothing, because there he stood, my dispicable father. He spun around to face me, quite surprised at my sudden appearence.
"Well, here you are." He opened his arms as he grinned, "Your quite the fast one, aren't you."
"And who do I have to thank for that?" I hissed at him, my two different colored eyes narrowed dangerously, and I clenched my fingers into fists.
"Hehe, I knew you'd appreciate my training." He stated nonchalantly.
"Training?" I took a step forward, "You call that constant abuse training?" I growled deep in my throat as he tried to touch my arm, the infected one. He could not get that advantage.
"Of course." He replied, not bothered by my rage at all, "Too bad you and your mother ran from me. I could have turned that unique ability of yours into something quite useful."
That was when I grew calmer on the outside, even though I was seething on the inside, but I quite glaring, unclenched my fists, and put my hands into the pockets of my black baggy pants.
"Of course," He continued when he spotted my bandages and how calm I had become, how secure I looked, "It seems you already use that gift."
"Eh, I guess." I replied and picked up a piece of paper that had yesterdays note on it from my mother, turning my back completely to my father.
This seemed to make him angry, at my complete lack of will to fight him. "Haven't I taught you better, Nathan."
"Well, I suppose so." I was still burning up with furious rage and anger on the inside, but I masked it, "Though, you were quite incompetent in your training, Father. Everything I learned I learned my fighters better than you and your drunken Military friends." I said, and I could feel his sadistic calmness die down as my words struck a sore spot in his ego. "You see, unlike you training where you taught me basic moves that would otherwise fail if I wasn't sober, which you were never, and neither was I, I actually know how to stand up to more than one fighter with military training." I said and then I heard his footsteps as he charged at me, enraged at my little speech.
"You ******** b***h!" He spat as he rushed me, but he had forgotten a certain factor about me. I had unique reflexes which enhanced my speed, so instead of grappling me to the ground like he had wanted to do, I had dodged under, around, and behind him before he made it to the spot where I had been three milliseconds before he reached a foot away from my being. I kicked his locked kneecaps from behind, making him lose his stance and kneel at the ground while I swiped at his arms with my boot knife, making deep gashes on his biceps. Then I spit at him, on his wounds.
"Eh. I also learned how to turn the situation around." Stated as he glared at me, but he was too blind with his fury to actually hear my words, much to his disadvantage, and he attempted to stand up. "Do it and I'll break your kneecaps before you have time to breathe." I hissed at him, making him stop.
It was just plain sad when an ex-marine is scared of a seventeen-year-old girl. A special, gifted, and uniquely altered seventeen-year-old girl, but a girl nevertheless.
"What the hell happened to you to make you such a demon?" He barked at me.
"The apple doesn't fall far from the tree." I retorted.
"Nathan!" three people's voices echoed through the house, and I turned and was met with the sight of all the thirty people who beat the snot out of me for a week. I would have sighed with hopelessness at them, but my father grabbed for my foot, tripping me.
Before he could pin me to the ground I jammed the end of the knife into his forehead, knocking him unconscious.
I was grabbed by Paul, Helena, Mariah and Grimm all at once as they checked me over for anymore scratches, damage, or wounds at once, muttering things I could quite hear or understand. My adrenaline rushed started to drain from me and I finally realized just how much danger I put myself in. How much I was truly scared on the inside.
I got weak, leaning heavily on Grimm and Paul since I knew the girls were scared too and wouldn't be able to support my weight. I was led, or dragged, to a chair where Paul sat me down and rechecked me over.
"Stop stop stop!" I pushed them all away. "Just get him out of here and get my mother on the phone." I said as I rested my head in my hand, then I noticed I cut my self on the hand, smearing blood on my forehead and cheek.
While everyone's back was turned, I fled from the chair upstairs to the bathroom and locked myself in there. I examined my face. Where did I get so many cuts from? I could understand the one on my hand because I had pulled the knife out, gripping the blade on mistake. Maybe the gash on my cheek was from flipping the blade around to knock out my father. Yes, that had to be it. I'm not that careless with a knife otherwise.
"Huh, guess I'll have to go to the hospital voluntarily this time." I muttered and started to clean myself up.
After exiting the bathroom, and running into Paul's chest, since he was picking the lock to get in to help me, I told them that I would willingly go to the doctor and I swear that almost all thirty of the members piled into about three cars. Ten in each, and they were racing to get to the hospital. I was squished and scared of dying all at once.
At the hospital, the doctor greeted me and pulled me into the room, slamming it on my friends on accident. I was hurried onto the table-chair-thing and started to get bandages ripped off and examined so fast, I was scared to move in case he snapped at me. I shrugged as five of the guild entered the room cautiously, also scared of the doctor, since he was freaking out about my cuts. He was like the father I wish would replace mine.
"You're gonna need some stitches in your cheek and your hand." He stated after addressing the damage.
I sighed. I hate stitches. They're always so painful, and annoying. Besides, I need that hand. I use it to write and things the most. Though, I can use both hands equally, I like my left hand. I voiced these thoughts out loud in a protesting tone, but the doctor gave me that look. The look that clearly, and aggitatedly said, "Just grin and bear it."
So I pouted the whole time the gashes where getting sewed up. I knew that these would most deffinately scar, and evern though it would look cool, it would draw attention to myself and my background when I head to my new school. They would most likely start asking me if i was getting abused, then start hating on my mother, and I can't exactly tell them that I'm in a fighters only guild where the initiation was a week of the whole group beating you up to test the worthiness of your fighting skills when you're least expecting it. Well, I could tell them but they'd freak out on me, which was annoying.
I saw my friends wincing and flinching as the needles pierced and weaved through my skin. I just stared at them, confused. "What?" I asked, seeing Helena covering her face.
"Doesn't that hurt?" Asked Lady Tennia.
I looked at them with a "huh?" expression, "No...?"
That's when everyone in the room, including the people sewing the skin together, stared at me with a "you have got to be kidding me" expression. I just shrugged at them, "What? I can't help what doesn't hurt." It was the way I had always been, which is probably why I can move so fast and fight so well.
I was drugged with painkillers, sewed up, and patched up by the time the police came to my house. I was locked up in my room, and the guild took care of everything downstairs, and I wrote my statement with my right hand, slightly struggling since I hadn't had to use that hand to do anything like that with in years. As I stared off absently into the small expanse of my room due to the unneeded painkillers, I started to wonder where my mom was. I wanted to talk to her to tell her that I was okay, but the Queen talked to her and assured her that I would be joining her at the new house soon.
I let my head rest on the desk, and I accidently dozed off into an uncomfortable sleep. I dreamed of my past, when I became an alcoholic, and when all this running away first started. I dreamed I was five years old again, being forced to reject my childhood, to reject my feelings for anyone that consisted of love and friendship, and forced to become the most obedient person the world had ever seen. I become an animal, forced to only appear when summoned, to keep away from any company that came over and put through the toughest training I've ever had. I remember getting beaten, and when I stared Henry in the eyes and told him that, even though I was beaten and bloodied so bad, I couldn't feel any pain at all, just tiny pin prickles. I remembered it all.
I remember hiding in the cupboard when the cops showed up to take my father away, and we moved while he was in jail, leaving no phone number address or anything for him to find us. While there were many Parkers out in the world, there were only a few Elishia Parkers, and even fewer Nathaina Parkers.
At last, I was woken up by Paul carrying me to my bed, though he had a bit of trouble since I'm almost as tall as him. He jumped when he realized I was looking at him. "What time is it?" I asked.
"Four thirty-five in the morning." He replied and made to leave, but I sat up and he was instantly at my side. If I was ever going to love someone, I wish it was right now, but I felt nothing for Paul. He made me lay back down on the bed and sat there beside me.
"Where is... He?" I asked in a hushed tone.
"Jail." He muttered. "I wish I could say how long he was there, but I cannot tell you that he'll be there forever."
"We just need enough time to get away again." I replied, closing my eyes. For once, I could feel a dull throb in my hand, cheek, and arm. I felt like crying. I felt like screaming. I felt like reliving the childhood I missed out on.
I had so many regrets in that moment, and I swore it was the time of morning and the medication that made me like this. I just wished I was normal. This was my normal, however. This was how my normality had always been.
I felt Paul touch my shoulder. "Its been a long day."
"Exciting." I joked quietly, and I heard him chuckle.
"Everyone either went home or is sleeping already, around the livingroom." He stated and I grunted in acknowledgement.
"Get some sleep." Told him and he got up to leave. "No, you're staying here. I need my friend." I whined playfully, still falling asleep slowly, even as I spoke. He chuckled again and laid back down.
Too bad I can't love him, I thought. Then I drifted off again.
 euya · Wed May 07, 2008 @ 03:28am · 0 Comments |
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