that it does.... i mean, why am i the one out of my whole family, whos most stressed? not even my parents are stressed. its just not right!
im 13, right? why do i feel like i carry the weight of the world on my shoulders then? am i not supposed to be some stupid rabid, drooling little girl who crushes on anyone and anything? a stupid little girl who gossips with friends? hangs out with friends? enjos life carefree? by 10 i was probably worst than this right now. i guess its slowly died off.
but its not right!! i ask my brother all these questions because hes learning how to drive and i say, "dont you feel stressed at all? dont you care that your about to walk into so trouble?"
"i dont care at all; remember? im carefree."
i cant believe him. if hes going to treat things like that then i want to switch places with him! he can be 13 and ill be 15! ill be the stressed, panicked, trapped one... even though i already am... but ill actually have something for it.
i swear i have the most mental damage anyone could ever see. i mean, i know a lot of people get those invisible weights on their shoudlers called depression, but mine never go away and i have no reason to be depressed. i have only 2 friends; i can never hang out with them either because their always busy... but hey, thats more than i had 5 years ago. all because i was aparently too emo for anyone to handle. wtf?
my school is what started it all im sure... those sick ba-
**Please stand by**
.... man how i would love to go back there and give them all a piece of my mind; expecially Devil Woman and Demon Boy. i would probably murder them if i seen them ever again.
"Oh you look so beautiful today..."
"um.. thank you?"
everyday was oppisite day at my school according to those two. DIE ALREADY!!
gawd... not even music is helping control myself anymore.... its no longer my escape nor will it rescue me.... i need help... -__-
carpal tunnel has also been stricking like volts of lightning; not a fun thing.
anyways.... the moral of this story is: Depression sucks major balls D:
 Olive_the_Monkey_Ninja · Sun Sep 18, 2005 @ 07:28pm · 1 Comments |
