Is upon us, and I don't want 2009 to come. I don't want to think that I'm halfway through my freshman year; I feel only half alive at school. Hell, I feel half alive all the time. Nothing is like before, not the same spark of life everyday. There might be one streak of fire every two months or something, to remind me and bring up the longing of how things used to be, but I don't think it'll ever be the same.
My friend who's a senior swears that high school changes you. Frankly, I think middle school was my most altering time, and I don't want to change what I've become. Everyone says that high school is the most exciting time of your life, where you'll make the most memories. Honestly, I think I lived out my best years already and these next four will remind me of life before 2006-2008. Two short years, that's all.
New Year's is supposed to be a time for opptimism, but everything has a pretty bleak outlook as of now.
I guess, it would be easier if I stayed more attached to my friends. But half the time, when I have time to see them, they're somewhere out of reach (at most, halfway across the country) and I'm left at home. I'm already so dependent on them; already, this seperation seems dangerous to my health. How will I put up with three and a half more years?
Everyone says you make your most lasting relationships in high school. Not for me. There's one nice person I'm close to, and who seems to be just as close to me, but it's nowhere near what I feel for my three fruits.
I want my Lion and Lamb necklace. =(
 Deoxyribose Dollface · Wed Dec 31, 2008 @ 08:55pm · 0 Comments |
