Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

So, much has happened.

*sigh* I had some sort of attack and theres probably something wrong with me now.

I'm not saying what started it, but after something I was sitting in my chair slumped over my head over my desk, my eye sight went blank (I could see but it didn't feel like I was seeing anything) My face, arms, legs almost everything went cold {Ice cold] and I started crying [and probably drolling a bit as well but I really don't care] I couldn't move, only cry so yeah.... it was interesting.

I don't even remember when I tried but after the attack sort of thing, I did try to stab my hand... didn't work [barely even got through my skin ~_~] that was a like a day or so ago and its already almost healed.


I wrote 2 poems that no one will ever read, I had allot of depression and even writing the two, it didn't help.

Today I was home alone again, *sighs* my life sucks now. Or maybe it always has I'm just noticing now but... its always so depressing. Enough to make me want to kill myself but I've tried and failed so many times in my life *shrugs* why bother trying again, I already know I'm still going to be alive after.


So this is were I say goodbye yet again.


My friend popcorn told me to start something new but sadly it isn't working very well. What I need now is to get away from this all but I'm stuck here for such a long time... anyway bye. Don't bother talking to me about any of this.... ANYONE I wont talk about any of this please don't freak en' ask me or give advice because I'm sick and tired of it. Nothing helps so don't bother.

EDIT:
[and no this is not some reverse sort of thing I DO NOT WANT F***ING HELP]