I know somethings wrong with him, whether he realises it himself or not. In about a month, maybe two. Wow, come to think of it... closer to three (time passes too quickly sometimes) hes changed. A lot. I don't understand why or how either, and I'm getting frustraited at myself for not knowing. When I lay in bed at night, thats what I think about, why don't I just ask him? And last night it suddenly hit me. I'm afraid. afraid. Here I am fussing about how hes changed while I myself am afraid of asking someone who knows eveything about me, a couple simple questions. The me I want people to see anyway. Well today I realised why. Whenever I say something he does not want to hear, something that just complicates things, something I'm, sadly, all to good at, he either gets even more depressed, or he leaves to think. Either one is awful, and even more often, it's both. What do I do then?! I've been really dazed lately, even hannah said so (and no offence to hannah, but that's saying something). I feel like I'm drifting or something, to be crude, it feels like I'm stoned. Not that I've ever been stoned, but thats not really the point. Its been really foggy lately, and thats exactly how I feel. The only person I would depend on in my life is slowly dieing, dissapearing. And god is that the worst feeling. The only one you love, who you'd do anything for, is dieing before your eyes and all you can do is watch. So now I'm left alone, to wander in the fog.
Hisietelella Community Member |
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