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wahmbulance SPOKE TOO SOON wahmbulance SPOKE TOO SOON wahmbulance

A letter from the guy that was ousted from the team - and my response in red...

To all concerned,

After receiving a call from David XXX Friday afternoon, head of softball, I regretfully decided to step away from managing the team. Let’s make certain that the facts are actually represented here, Mr. Tom contacted Byron to ask for a meeting to discuss some problems that had been brought to his attention by concerned parents. Parents who did in fact attempt (on several occasions no less) to discuss the issues at hand. Unfortunately Byron absolutely refused Mr. XXX's meeting, just as he had refused the previous attempts and instead – quit. Mr. XXX stated he had received complaints from a couple mothers questioning my commitment to the team and more importantly that I have made inappropriate comments toward some of the girls. The complaints came from not only concerned parents, but also were brought on behalf of several members of the team who on different occasions asked if it would be possible to fire Byron. These same mothers have complained about my managing/umpiring for three years from the stands but to do so as assistant coaches I found unacceptable. Just to make another simple clarification and again to ensure the truth is represented here, Byron has never managed a team prior to this one – and it is my firm opinion that he certainly should never be allowed to do so in the future. I would like to take this time to thank those parents and players who informed me of what was being said behind my back. The things that have been said regarding Byron’s umpiring have been done quite openly - and again several attempts were made to openly discuss his actions on the softball field and had the requests been accepted the unfortunate events of late could have easily been resolved with dignity, class, and grace. None of this would be happening now. The problems and concerns would have been addressed, satisfied, and been done with. Instead, some individuals felt it would be beneficial to pit their children’s friends against their other friends by pointing fingers and forcing their own children to choose sides with half the team to be “against” Byron and half the team “for” Byron. I wish these individuals would of brought these concerns upto me instead of going behind my back to Mr. XXX. On four separate occasions, four separate individuals approached Byron requesting a talk (away from the children) regarding his unacceptable use of profanity on the softball field, his constant belittling children in front of their peers, and making comments about these young women being “hopeless,” “helpless,” and “clueless” when they did not perform. Please note that at no time did Byron ever offer suggestions to the children he called “clueless,” “helpless,” and “hopeless” as to how to improve – he just pulled them off their positions and made derogatory comments about their abilities. If they had I would of stated I only missed 1 mon/thurs practice to coach the final game of a boys basketball team that I had been involved with for 3 months. I do not believe that this was the issue. The issue for me is and always has been inappropriate behavior and misconduct around the children. I did miss some voluntary Saturday practices that were given to my assistants to run, I had no idea that missing those would be used to undermine my position as manager. Again, not certain where this came from, or why it was at issue. As for "inappropriate comments" made to the girls I NEVER spoke to any player one to one and anything that was said was in front of the entire team as well as the parents in the stands. For clarification purposes, it is exceptionally important to note here that Byron admits he made inappropriate comments on the field in regards to YOUR children. For some reason he believes a valid defense to that is to say that he did it in front of the entire team rather than to pull a child aside and say it to her face. When they stooped to that level I thought it was best to step aside in order to keep my reputation. Perhaps a better move would have been to act appropriately in front of the children. I would love to still be your manager but I cannot see myself working with these individuals. As we all are painfully aware, a fact-finding mission was set into place – and it was decided that Byron would not be asked to come back in any capacity. Instead he was replaced by Bob XXX.I felt I had to send this email in order to set the record straight for even after my departure from the team the talking is still going on behind my back. I will see you all in the stands as a fan and good luck to all. I realize that this response will fall upon deaf ears to those who are so blindly defending Byron’s behavior on the field, but I think that this mass email was to try to garner sympathy and to save face.

Perhaps some of you as parents actually do feel it is acceptable for Byron to call your child “hopeless” and “clueless” and "helpless" and perhaps you believe that it is acceptable for your child to be yelled at to “just catch the damn ball,” but I not only strongly disagree with the use of profanity, I also refuse to call it acceptable.

Me, Lunar

Byron