I'm not sure why. Recently I have become more deppressed. I'm not if it's because My grades are bad and my parents nagg me till they finished, the constent stress I'm feeling from eveyone and everything, or that I feel like my friends have finally just left me because they've found better things to do and better people to hang out with. Maybe it's all of this put together. But I try to cheer myself up because I know theres people out there with far worse things going on in thier life than mine. It feels like I have to put on a forced smile so people don't ask whats wrong. I don't cry on the outside but on the inside it feels like a waterfall breaking against sharp rocks at the bottom. But I know that when I get upset at somthing that happened or at somthing someone said, I go into a blind rage and curse and somtimes even get physical. But I don't do that until the person in front of me did somthing to set it off. (If that makes sense) Afterword I feel terrible because I did somthing bad because of jus words. But I feel now that words can hurt way more than breaking bones do. I'm not sure what to do of all this stress and things going on. It hurts, hurts like hell.
But I guess thats all I have to say for now.
 C I G S - C O F F E E · Thu Oct 09, 2008 @ 03:11am · 0 Comments |
