This one was long, and made me roflol. I almost always "play God" on Omegle, which illicits THE greatest conversations. This one was one of my first ones:
2440 users online
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello. I am God, and you may ask me one question.
Stranger: say hi
Stranger: ummmmmmm
You: God does not have all day, child
Stranger: why is my weiner hard in the morning?
You: Because all my things are hard in the morning. That's just how it is, yo.
Stranger: no wait
Stranger: only one questin?
Stranger: wait
You: You may ask as many as you please
Stranger: will i go to heavan?
You: As long as you stay away from Hotpockets
You: Those things are EVIL
You: and the work of SATAN
You: D:<
Stranger: o o k
Stranger: well i already do
You: That is good, my son.
Stranger: do you like jones soda god?
You: I like everything that I created, my son
You: I do not discriminate
You: Is that all?
Stranger: ummmm
Stranger: will i ever get laid?
Stranger: after marriage
You: In due time, my son. You will get married, that much is clear to me.
Stranger: Can I have two dicks?
You: ...
You: Well I don't know about that one
You: Maybe if I fuzzed up on the assembly line or something
Stranger: awww
Stranger: well
Stranger: My turtle died will you bring him back
You: I cannot, my child. Why don't you sacrifice a goat to Satan and see if he can instead
You: We are on good terms now
You: besides the whole Hotpockets thing
Stranger: o thats good
Stranger: ill ask him later
Stranger: so
Stranger: what kinda cpu is God rockin?
You: Cpu? I do not understand
You: D:
Stranger: Central Proccesing Unit or Computer
You: Ah. I see. I do not use a computer. I just have to think, and it is made real
You: That's how I made the Universe =P
Stranger: What world of warcraft class should I make?
You: ..... Roll a die
You: Assign a number for each class
Stranger: o i c
You: Fate will do the rest
Stranger: if you had to pick
Stranger: though
You: I am not sure. I do not tend to meddle in Human's affairs
Stranger: oh i see
You: *If I had a say, go with whatever has a huge sword
Stranger: What is there to do in heavan?
You: *but you didn't hear it from me
You: Nothing but watching nacked winged dudes fly around
You: *naked
You: Not my cup of tea
You: But not like I have a choice
Stranger: god doesnt make typos
You: Humans do, and they were made in MY image
You: So I do
Stranger: oh
Stranger: Is the subway foot long really 12 inches?
You: No, it is only 10 1/2. They skimped.
Stranger: damn
Stranger: Well what substore does have 12 inch foot longs?
You: Quizno's
You: Subway is owned by the DEVIL D:<
Stranger: what about submarina?
You: That is owned by Jesus. Don't trust him; he still is a little peeved at the whole "Let's crucify his a**" thing :/
Stranger: yeah some people just need to live and let go
Stranger: ok so like
Stranger: if god spelled backwards is dog.....
Stranger: does that make you a cat?
You: Well done, smart human. You finally discovered the secret of life! God is secretly a Cat. Now that you found the meaning of Life, you will die in exactly 53 seconds. Goodbye.
Stranger: ******** you god
You have disconnected.
 Kazuko Masami · Fri Jun 12, 2009 @ 08:47pm · 0 Comments |
