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I'm lost.
I can't find myself, in this pitch black void. It feels as if i'm the only one there. At times i feel lonely, that maybe if i had someone with me, this place would be almost like home. But it wouldn't be. It would cease to be the simple, plain yet lovely ebony veil that i had come to enjoy so much. it would no longer feel "right". The thick blanket of darkness and secret intentions would be lit with hope and maybe even happiness. It would feel...like i'm no longer where i belong.

At times i can hear a faint cry, like someone else had gotten lost here, but i do nothing to help them. It's not like i don't want to. I mean, what if they're just a stray, lost in this place trying to find something that they lost? I question my own judgment sometimes and take a step to help them but change my mind. They'll just have to try harder.

I've fallen in love with this place, you see. It is my piece of "heaven" and the only place where i can be me. Noo one can tell me who to be, what to do, who to change into. No one else but me. That's the way it ought to be, yet when i hear that cry, this pain in my chest...is it regret? Shame? Whatever it is, it takes over me and i can do naught but feel...something. Almost as if i feel for them. But i don't. I can't. I shouldn't. But still more urgent, i might.

I don't think i know anymore if that sound comes. i don't pay attention to thing that concern me not. Subete wo yami ni, that is the mantra that is shouted to the darkness when i can do naught but think of the world which left me behind. All in darkness.

i have long since given up "hope" that i could be saved, that someone would come and save me. Maybe i'm just not worth it. I tell this to myself all the time, and now i belive that it is the simple yet sad truth. No one would dare to invade the ebony bliss that surrounds me, covers my form lovingly like a mother would her newborn child. Do i have "value" you ask? No, i don't think i do. But who knows? I just might.

Do i still have a "heart"? No, i surrendered it to the darkness. Where are my "Morals"? They have long since been forgotten. Do i even "care" about things that are not related to me? I'm not so sure. I care for the dark void who has lovingly sheltered and nurtured me, yes. But others...just one.