For the last few days this week. I've done a lot of thinking. Thinking of my past and my future. Specifically my weight. It has effected me in many ways. I've been overweight almost all life. I remember a time in particular, I was in the 2nd grade, and everyone at my table asked how much I weight, and I recall saying "110 pounds" Like it wasn't a big deal. I was 7 years old weighing 110, the average weight of a 13 year old girl. I started drinking soda at a young age, a bad habit to develop. I would be called names like "fatty" and "hippo" and all the hurtful things. I never cried about it.. but I think it's come back to me because it's easily for me to cry now. I'm not one to tell people about my problems, so here I am writing in my gaia journal.
I am now 18 years old. I am ashamed to say that I weigh 275 pounds. That is almost 300. I never wanna hit 300 pounds in my life. I like to dance and run but it's hard for me because I run out of breath so quickly, and I just give up. My eating habits are terrible. I eat fast food 3, 4, and sometimes even 5 days out of the week. I eat sugary things, like ice-cream, sweet bread, and cookies. I don't drink much water. And I don't exercise as much as I should. When I go on a diet I quit it in less than a week.
I'm scared. I'll admit I am scared of what can happen to me. I can get a heart attack by the age of 20 if this goes on. High blood pressure.. not something I need or want. It's hard to have good eating habits because my family doesn't have them and I get my encouragement from my family. My Mom, Grandma, and my Uncle are overweight along with myself. I want all of us to uplift one another and I want to be a healthy family. I want all of us to live life the right way, healthy. I want it to stop. The bad eating habits, the lack of exercise. I want to see things in a positive way and help not just family, not just friends, but myself.
I go to the store and see the cutest clothes I'd love to wear, but see myself too big. I want to have a nice body and wear whatever I want without having to feel insecure and uncomfortable with myself. I want to wear, skirts, tank tops, high heels and be full of confidence. I don't want to live life for another 20 years and realize that I'm overweight and not happy. I want to go out in public and feel beautiful. Right now the beautiful confident girl is locked inside, and I'm ready to bring her out. To get rid of the old me. Because I realized that I've been overweight for 18 years and it's going to change. I just need a little support from all my friends... that's all I'm asking.
This past month I've been inspired by two things. The Biggest Loser and Doctor Oz. It's made me emotional and it's made me want to change. I want to be one of those people who make it in life to help others to become healthy. I'm not going to sit here and wish, I'm going to get up and gain. It's time for a difference. I'm tired of being fat, I'm tired of making excuses for myself. I'm tired of being tired.
No more fattening food, no more lack of exercise. No more having no confidence. I'm going to start a food journal and eat right. Whenever I crave something unhealthy, I'm gonna tell myself "A moment on the Lips, forever on the hips" I'm also telling you friends on gaia that you can do this. You can do whatever you set your mind to and I have faith in every single one of you. For me, there's no going back to the Corrina that hated her body.
I'm going to get out there and I promise you, by next spring, There's gonna be a new me.
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Tropical's Dreams, Stories, and sometimes Poems :3
Hi I'm Corrina! *A.k.a Tropical Dreams*
This is where I post my every life. Things like Stories, Poems, Feelings and so on. Comment if you like ^.^
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