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	My life and how I've survived Well, I guess this will be about just about anything that happens in my life. Not much to write but sooo much drama that it would be a great soap opera haha

	WTF?!?!?!
	WTF?!?!?!


So, Curtis is going to join the Marines (sp?). I've cried more than my share over it but I think I'm about to accept it. If he gets to he's going to bootcamp in August... I just wished he wasn't. We promised so long ago he wouldn't go away, but.... I dunno. I can't even think about it without wanting to cry. He's leaving me alone which seems stupid to say but three months in school without him, it's rough on a I will be then 14 year old girl. I know I'll be fine but it'll be hard to make it through every day and stuff... I'll have to improve my handwriting to send letters to him. He says he wants to try new stuff and see new place... I just took the answer. I didn't want to hear anymore. He just came up to me I think yesterday after eighth and says "I'm joining the Marines." I just followed him and grit my teeth to keep from crying right there. I'm so shocked that he's going. I don't want him to leave me. There is so much I'd do just to make him stay. I can't stand the emptiness I get just thinking about it. It hurts but it's something he wants to do for "us" because of all the money you get. I could care less about the money. Plus he wants to keep going back for stuff and I dunno how well I'm going to handle that. He keeps trying to reassure me it's a good thing but I don't see the good in it for me. Three months without him and tears every night when I go to bed and emptiness everyday and lonelyness every night and.... I dunno. I can't stand this. It seems like I'm being testing on how much I can handle and I've found my limit. Actually, this passed my limit, but I can't just leave him or something. I've promised I'd stay with him always. It's going to be so hard on me but I'm not going to let this break me. I'll grit my teeth and show the world I can take on worse than what they could ever throw at me. I can already see it when he leaves though. Everyone will ask about him and I'll just wanna cry. I'll probably stay home for a bit if he leaves when school starts. I dunno how I'll keep on smiling. I don't see what he wants to prove or anything but I'm done questioning his reasons. I'm just going to let him go and do his best since I can't just say stay and he can. He is pretty much theirs now. I.. I dunno anymore. I really hope this doesn't end up with my heart on the floor and stuff. :'/ crying Dino_lover_RAWR · Fri Oct 08, 2010 @ 03:19am · 0 Comments


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