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Part 11 Please comment. smile

I found a strange book today. Usually on Saturday I do laundry and clean my apartment, but today was different. It's been 2 weeks since I found out about my Mom's Quincy heritage. I have many questions about them. I don't want to press my Mom for information. It was hard on her to tell me about her family and her past. I don't have names except that my grandmother's name was Saya .And I'm not sure exactly where in Japan my mother's family is from. After my errands I went to the used book shop. One of my co- workers recommended it for hard to find books. Why I think I need more baffles me. I have too many books as it is. I went in the shop and saw a book that was white and had a light blue cross on it. I asked how much it was and the shop keeper said it came in a recent shipment. She said that I could have it for a good price. It wasn't much. I went to Karakura Community Park and sat at a picnic table. I read about the history of the Quincy for about 2 hours. I lost track of time reading about them . I left the park and went back home.

How does this affect me? I don't want to fall in deeper than I already have. Why did the Quincy disappear? Are there any left? Are there any here in Karakura?There has to be . I wonder who owned that book before me? As I look at it I have a strange feeling of pride. I feel alone. I feel sad when I think about them. I look at my silver cross and wonder who was the one who gave it to me? I received it when I was 7. Did my grandfather make it for me? He must have known about us kids. I wear it now on my right wrist. I don't show it to my coworkers. I feel closer to my grandfather when I wear it. I wonder if he did love me and my siblings. So many things went unsaid. It's too late to make things better between my Mom and her father.All I can do is to be as open to my parents as I can. As far I know my Dad doesn't know . I hate keeping secrets.I don't want anyone to know . Is Ryo a Quincy? There was something different about him. I hope he is safe. I don't want to lose my younger brother.So many questions and emotions are going though my head right now. It's a miracle that I can sleep at night and function at work without causing suspicion. I must get to bed . Tomorrow I have to get groceries and finish my laundry. The more I think about normal things the better I feel.