France: I just watched the Lion King for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good b*****b.
Me: ... How do you know this?
France: ;D
Me: OH GOD WHY THE HELL ARE YOU TELLING ME THIS?!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Prussia: So, how'd your date go.
France: Didn't go.
Prussia: Wha-?! How come?! She was hot!
France: Found out she has a reputation for trying to bone her hook ups in the a** with a pickle.
Prussia: ... Dude... That's ******** up.
France: I know. I don't like pickle sex, Pru. Vinegar hurts like a b***h.
Prussia: xD LMAO. How do you know this?!
France: My cousin.
Prussia: Ah. Makes sense; that guy's the most insane manwhore I've ever met. Did he seriously ******** himself with a gun, then give it to his girlfriend?
France: No. His girlfriend did that, then gave it to him as their anniversary present. They're now getting married.
Prussia: Christ they're both crazy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Japan: *at 3 ******** AM* -O____________O-
Germany: What the hell do you want Tohru?
Japan: There's a huge spider in my room.
Germany: You woke me up at ******** 3 AM... Because there's a spider in your room.
Japan: A huge spider!
Germany: What do you want me to do about it?
Japan: Come over here and kill it! You can come in through my bedroom window.
Germany: Get your boyfriend to do it! I have a big test tomorrow.
Japan: Already tried. He just told me to go back to slee OH GOD WHERE DID IT GO?!
Germany: Tohru? Tohru, you there?
Japan: -15 minutes later- It's dead.
Germany: You killed it?
Japan: No, I just threw my underwear at it and screamed like a girl. My big brother woke up and came in and stomped on it. -^_^-
Germany: ... You do know that throwing your underwear at it isn't the solution to everything, right?
Japan: It was the closest object!
 DulledShining · Fri Dec 16, 2011 @ 03:07am · 0 Comments |
