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Ok... I've been thinking a little too much, to the point where its going to kill some one if they say the exact wrong thing.
One thing I was thinking about is that, What happens if I reach my goal of being an airforce pilot? Do I get to do what I want and have some fun in a jet, or do I fail horribly and crash my jet just as I take off, causing my imminent doom to come quicker? I dont understand some of these deep thought questions... I get some of them, but I dont have any idea what they mean...
Second thing is, There is a senior in our school that likes me, and I sorta like her, but what will happen if I do go out with her. I mean she is 18, and I'm only 15. I keep thinking what will happen if I go out with her and they all lead to either me getting arrested for something stupid, or she gets arrested cause they think we are having sex. Ugh. I just dont get it, why would some one of her class even like someone like me. I'm only rarely nice, I'm a really mean person and almost seem as if I have no emotions, no feelings, and not any sympathy what so ever, but I mean come on, I'm a freshmen, shes a senior. Put two and two together and you still get an odd number when you look at it in a certain way. People say we look like a "cute couple" but I hate it when they say stuff like that, I've only loved one person more than anything before and people said we were a cute couple, I hated when they said it cause it aggitated me. We went out twice then agreed to not date anymore.
Also I'm getting taller. My size usually made people think I'm "cute", or "adorable", but those people usually dont Effing know me. But those people who actually look close enough to say, "You have pretty eyes" I sometimes thank you then say Stop saying that. I dont mind a good complement once in a while, but I mean once you hear it 6000 times then you wanna kill anyone that says it. Yes but back on my size issue. What if I became taller than almost all of my friends, I would hate it, I dont like being short some times but when you learn to use it to your advantage, you begin to like it. I'll be short all my life but I dont wanna be tall through out my highschool years... I hate that fact! HATE it.
No more depressing talk... I was reading the JTHM comic directors cut and almost started thinking in the depressive mood again then I thought what it would be like to actually meet god and satin, would heaven really be a s**t hole, or would hell be like the real world without the morons for world leaders.
Hey, gotta go, if you wanna hear more of my ranting then wait for the next time.
 B A N N 3 D · Tue Mar 27, 2007 @ 03:51am · 3 Comments |
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