The boy that i have been on and off with for three years, the boy i lost it to, the boy i love, the boy who said he loved me, i was thinking about askng him who was to him...lke i kno that i am his girlfriend, and his first but with our long distance relationship its hard and espeacially with the factor of not talking to him untl every 5 or mor months, ont seeing him for even more time then that. when i have people n my ear telling me all this nonsence about what they think is going on, they dont kno how much it hurts me. they make me feel sooo alone and it hurts me but my love for him keeps me going on...but t hurts knowing that he isnt there, i forget his voice and how he looks. when i saw twilight new moon the other day i was surprised that i could even relate to bella, when she said i just wanted to know that he was real. swear sometimes i feel crazy when a tell people about him but it feels like im telling them about a fairytale boyfriend. then my dedication to him turns into doubt. see now i already haev enough emotional issues and esteem issues -i hope noone is really reading this-. now that i am finding out about myself, im needing to see if he is willing to stick around for me to growup. m still getting over the boy who was suppose to be my frend who couldnt handle me telling him the truth about me and the boy i lost it to, so even though he abandoned me i need to keep together. i need to know what boys are willing to stay the course with me, WITHOUT WANTING SEX!!!!
poetic_wordz Community Member 
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