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Yo~
 Antidia · Tue Apr 19, 2011 @ 02:37am · 0 Comments |
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I don't update this journal often, for good reason. But there is something that I do want to say, but I haven't been able to find the proper platform to say it.
So I figured this would work, since it pertains to Gaia.
The more someone whines or bitches, the less inclined I am do to stuff for them.
Push me; I will push back.
Threaten me; I will call the bluff.
Try to manipulate me; I will never do anything for that person ever again.
I am fair. Just don't piss me off by being whiny, threatening me, pushing me or trying to manipulate me.
Antidia · Tue Feb 02, 2010 @ 03:12am · 0 Comments |
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I just got back from a spontaneous trip to Montana to see my family. I am aware that my grampa is in poor health, and was informed that I was to go, so I could say my final farewells. This was not the full truth. This trip was a vacation for my sister and her husband, seeing my grampa and dad was just part of the trip.
While a few things we did were fun (we mined for sapphires and went to the CMR museum) but overall, I wish I had not gone. I was forced to go, by my mother. I didn't want to spend time with my sister and her husband, because they make me uncomfortable with how openly public and often they fight. I had no money for this trip, and they knew it. But apparently, the in-law was pissy about spending money on me, so he made me feel like I was lower than dirt, and not even worthy of being treated like a human being. I guess $40 is how much it cost to be allowed to treat another human being like scum.
My grampa is actually in better health then I was led to believe, and I could have just gone with my mom and brother in October. Would have been a less stressful trip IMO.
As much as I regretted going, I am glad I got to see my family, and make amends with my dad. He's not changed as much as I would have thought, now that he's out of prison, but I guess I expected miracles. sweatdrop It was good to see him getting along with my sister too. They'd not spoken to each other over 4 years, because they'd disowned each other.
Antidia · Sun Aug 05, 2007 @ 08:32pm · 1 Comments |
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Its a nasty cycle it seems... |
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I feel damned if I do, damned if I don't ... most of the time.
If I am nice, I get walked all over and taken advantage. If I am mean, I get treated like crap. How do I win?
I try to be fair in all things I do. I try to be honest with reactions and feelings regarding others, unless it might hurt or disappoint them. (In which case, I hold back). I try to stay logical and rational in all my decisions. There's probably not a single decision I make in a day (besides the one to sit in front of my puter all day) that I make with only myself, or my own needs in mind.
I am called childish and petty. For what? Being nice? Not knowing how to say no? Getting my own feelings hurt once in a while? Doesn't quite seem right to me ...
So what if I start being blunt and saying what is on my mind, instead of using tact and being nice? What if I said no to absolutely everything I didn't want to do, or thought was a stupid idea? I know I will quickly make many people mad, and hurt a lot of feelings. Is that what being an adult means?
Maybe I will try it...
Antidia · Sat Jun 02, 2007 @ 08:14pm · 1 Comments |
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I am slowly working on FA stuff to catch up, so I can do a flat sale soon. Mel's coloring them all in a special theme. After that a Naiad sale based on Spooky's suggestion is planned. On top of this, we're planning a huge party/RP event for the beginning of June. Lots of stuff!! eek
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In other news ... every time I see a certain pet, or the shop it came from, I get upset. I obtained one of these pets for Christmas 2005 ... I paid for a fully custom, fully growing pet. I only ever got the BABY stage. I was never added to the owner's list either. I PM'd the shop owner a few times ... the first time, I get the excuse that if the colorist quit, there's nothing they can do about it. (bullshit) then I get the reason that my pet will grow as soon as I RP her. First of all ... I HAVE RP'd her in the past. Second of all, RPing was NOT part of the "contract" when I got this pet.
Its been almost a year and a half now, and I am STILL not even on the owners list. I have harbored some very bitter feelings towards this particular pet shop and I would like satisfactory resolution. But I can't RP there if I am so bitter about how I am being treated.
I wish I could let this go, but I feel like I am being screwed over for something that wasn't even my fault.
*sigh* maybe posting this will help.
Antidia · Fri May 11, 2007 @ 10:11pm · 2 Comments |
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Tiny public service announcement |
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Real Live > Gaia Life
Don't go by my last log in date. Gaia is set as my homepage and usually auto-long-in so my sister can play dress up with my avatar when she uses my computer. And I occassionally do log in to see if I have PMs.
Antidia · Mon Apr 23, 2007 @ 07:35pm · 0 Comments |
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I am frustrated, bitter, burned-out, and just plain tired. Of Gaia, of art, of LIFE!
Having said that ...
I am struggling to find a GOOD reason to not just say 'to hell with it' on Gaia and never come back.
If I DO choose this course of action, I am taking my breedables shop with me, by closing it down and potentially opening it on a different site, independent of Gaia and their TOS. (not saying they are bad, jsut saying, I will have my own rules for forums lol)
I dunno ... its not written in stone, just the direction my mind is heading unless some miracle or something happens to convince me otherwise. confused
I will have a lot of people to pay back tho, if I do this, because of that new stupid breedables rule. Plus I will have to pay Hige back. On the other hand, if I am never coming back to Gaia ... I guess a banned account wouldn't matter, and be a good way to keep me from returning if I suffer a momentary lapse in judgement. haha
I will think on it some more ... till I make a final decision, I will not be around a whole lot.
EDIT: So, that magical convincing reason came to me today. More on that later. heart
Antidia · Wed Mar 21, 2007 @ 08:17am · 0 Comments |
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