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Life's a cup of detoxing tea |
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God, looking through all my journals that I've ever kept online, because honestly those are the only one's I've ever kept. I've come to realize quite a few things. I'm not stable, in mind and thought, not to mean I'll flip out and like shoot people are anything, no no, I mean I change my pattern of thinking quite often, still the underlining themes stays the same but the thought processes change. Right now I'm on a huge coffee buzz even though I should be sleeping.
So yeah on to this years newest and so far only Mad hatter entry. So yeah alot has happened to me since I've last updated, first and foremost, I've been coping with the death of my mother, she died young, and I'm only 20, but I digress, It's been a year now but I still feel pings of sorrow. So I guess this rant, rave of advice will probably go back to a previous rant I made years ago. The subject is, drum roll please, growing up.
Yes those famous words "You need to grow up". Funny how now I'm a college kid, who's dropped out temporarily to get a job and earn the means to my survival, yet I still get told these lines, not just by my friend whenever we argue but by a lot of people including myself. I think I've gotten one step closer to know what the phrase means. When someone say you need to grow up it really means, why don't you act the way I deem to be normal, and appropriate for you? That's how it's always used isn't it? I mean really think about the last it someone told you to "grow up". What exactly happened before they used that famous or rather infamous line?
See what I mean, growing up is not about getting older it's about fitting into what either someone or society thinks as a whole is normal and appropriate for someone. So to me honestly I can say when I tell myself I need to grow up, I've grown up alot. Maybe too much, I don't fit societies expectation for a grown-up but I fit mine, to a certain extent, I still got alot of growing to do, and I'll probably never stop growing.
So I guess my point is this, to grow up, should me, to develop yourself in a way you find comfortable, yet still makes you compatible enough with society that you can function in it when you need to, and if needed to you can do you part to change it for the better. Yeah I think that's what I believe growing up is.
I guess many of you, whom I guess it's not going to be many seeing as I haven't updated my journal in years are probably wondering what does my title have to do with this post. Well honestly it has nothing to do with it. Its there for thought, to open you up. I mean honestly what does that title say to you? What does what you think that title mean say about you?
Here what is says to be, Life is this foul tasting brew that's mean to drunken so that you eventually when you've had enough of it, you essence will be cleansed of most impurities. Now what does that say about me, well I guess it can say I'm a hopeful depressed individual, someone who's barely holding on, but hopes to one day be strong enough to lift themselves up.
Crepu-Jewel · Sun Dec 26, 2010 @ 08:13am · 0 Comments |
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