Ahh yes Divorce from the latin word meaning to rip out a mans ginitals through his wallet. -Robbin Williams
Women Complain about PMS, but i think of it as the only time of the month that i get to be myself.- Rossane
Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place- Billy Crystal
You can say anything to a dog and will give a look that says, "My god your right! I never would of thought of that!-Dave Berry
According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable about undressing in front of men then they do about women. They say that women are more judgemental where men are just grateful!-Jay Leno
In the last couple of weeks i have seen ads for the wonder bra. Is that really a problem in this country? Men not paying attention to womens breasts- Jay Leno
We have women in the millitary, but they dont put us in the front lines. They dont think we can fight, if we can kill. I think we can. All the general has to do is say, "you see the enemy over there? they say you look fat in those uniforms!"- Elayne Boosler
Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who choosee your rest home- Phyliss Diller
When the sun come up i got morals again- Elayne Boosler
Theres a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many man are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So, what the problem?-Jay Leno
Theres very little advice in mens magazines, because men dont think theres a lot they dont know. Women Do. Women want to learn. Men think, "i know what im doing just show me somebody naked."-Jerry Seinfeld
If you cant beat them, arrange for them to get beaten.-George Carlin
Instead of getting married again, im going to find a woman i dont like and give her a house!- Lewis Grizzard
The problem with the designated driver problem, its not a desirable job. But if your ever sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night drop them off at the wrong house.-Jeff Foxworthy
See, the problem is that god gave man a brain and a p***s, but only enough blood to work one at a time.-Robin Williams
lordbagelboy Community Member 
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