I wrote this for a good friend of mine for her birthday. fortunately, i did end up getting her a gift along with this. lol ^_^
The Best Thing Ever
Dear Friend,
For your birthday I wanted to give you something that you would never forget. I wanted you to be really happy, as you should be. Since your birthday was the next day, I didn’t have much time to plan. I decided that I wanted to throw you a huge party. Everything was going ok until the decorator man told me that the decorations I had requested were too expensive, and that I should probably make some kind of cheap compromise. Naturally, this didn’t sit well with me and I got a little angry… ok, maybe a little more than just a little. I locked the decorator man in a dungeon underneath my house for a few hours until the investigator team came looking for him. They took me to court and the decided that I was never allowed to plan a party ever again. Harsh punishment, I know. Obviously now I was once again stuck on how to give you the best thing ever for your birthday party. I walked around town for a while and then it hit me! I would give you the biggest selection of glorious balloons! I went to the grocery store and voiced my idea to them and they gladly helped me, more so because I told them I would pay them to. I picked out the best balloons but at the cash register I was getting really tired of them floating to the ceiling every chance they got. I asked the cash register guy what to do, and her told me I should go home and tie rocks on them to keep them down. I thought this was a little odd, but I went home and did what he said anyways. The balloons popped… I guess I didn’t really understand where he meant me to tie the rocks. To me, it only made sense to tie them to the main part of the balloon. After all, that was the part that kept floating up. By then I was slightly annoyed that my quest to get you the best thing ever had gotten off to such a bad start. Since I couldn’t think of anything else, I decided to buy you a gift. It would be a good gift. Something you wouldn’t forget. I went to Toys R Us. I was slightly bothered by the apparent lack of intelligence of the people they hired to put up their store sign, because the spelling was horrible. They spelled R backwards! Who does that? Anyways, I went into the store and asked them if they had any really big stuffed animals. The lady pointed to one up high on a shelf, but it burned my eyes. I told them that I could never make my friend suffer by giving her a huge, bright pink, unicorn. The lady gave me a funny look that ticked me off, so I stormed out of the store and phoned in a bomb threat. No one believed the call, so I put a real bomb in the store. Unfortunately, the police came so I ran away. Once again, I had failed to get you the best thing ever. I decided then, since time was running out, just to make you a pretty card. I got the paper and scissors, but half way through cutting I got a paper cut and my blood got on your card. I got really mad and fed the paper to my rabid rabbits. They liked it a lot. By then I was so upset over the fact that I had failed my whole mission to get you the best thing ever that I destroyed a forest, much to the tree-hugger’s dismay. Since I only had an hour until I had to give you my gift, I decided just to write everything down to show you how much I tried. After all, it’s the thought that counts, right?
DisposableDarkness Community Member 
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