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Daine's Journal
A collection of stories, thoughts, wanderings, and a bunch of fictional writing. A place to develop my characters or just think out loud... You'll never know what may be true or not.
Parents and such...
I could learn to hate my father. Or rather, I could learn to hate summer and changing house rules.

My boyfriend has to be the most wonderful guy in the world, if you haven't caught on from my previous postings. But seriously, I do not know why he puts up with me.

Allow me to elaborate. As I do so very often.

My boyfriend's birthday is coming up and I have been dying to do something fabulous for him to celebrate with him. I love him so much and want him to have a wonderful birthday. My problem? My parents. I have been trying to plan a number of things to do, but live under very strict house rules. Because I still live at home over the summers and breaks and my parents are helping me out with college expenses, I am obligated to obide by their rules. Which I would be fine with if they didn't keep changing and didn't seem to be completely arbitrary to me and my situation. My curfew is set according to the day and what I'll be doing and what I need to do the next day, which is cool, because that means I can get it moved back when I want. Though recently it is just a pain. I'm taking my boyfriend out for his birthday and am picking him up in the afternoon. My curfew is set for early evening, despite the fact that I want to take him out to dinner and will have a long drive ahead of us. And my father has the gall to come in and tell me that I should try and get back even earlier, since I have been late in my curfew a number of times. Great. As if it isn't bad enough that I don't get to see my boyfriend but once a week and have limited amounts of time with him when I do get to see him. Maybe I sound spoiled or bitchy, but I do think this is unfair. My mom keeps pointing out I earn priveleges...but haven't 19 years of being good and obeying all the rules earned me trust and rights? Apparently not.

One other thing I've been thinking about is that my bf and his mom have invited me (in a sense) over to their house to celebrate with him during his family birthday. I don't know whether this is a sincere invite or not, though I guess I shouldn't worry. I just worry. Because I do that a lot. I don't want to intrude on their family celebrations...and I don't know what kind of present I could bring to him. Since I think it would be rude to appear with nothing and yet I'm not sure what I can do...

My mom also doesn't seem too thrilled about me going, since I have work the next day. So I don't want to try and reschedule their plans since I know my mom is going to be really stringent on what I'm doing that night, but I don't want to refuse him either. Life is tough.

I also hate that they're trying to control when I move back into my place up at college. I want to be in my place early so I don't lose control with my roomies, since if I'm not there early, I won't have any choices in how things are done. But they refuse to take me up on my convenience and instead will take me when they want. Which I think is unfair. I'm all for talking about it and trying to work out when we all can go up, but not taking my concerns into account is awful. And I was looking forward to a week without interruption with my bf where we could spend some time together.

Life can be difficult.

But on a happier note, I've never been happier in my entire life than when I'm with my bf. He is an absolutely wonderful person and is so good to me. I never feel like I am nearly as good to him as he is to me. I'm far too self-centered and vocal about my problems. I wish I could show him how much I love him, but I can never find a way. And I know I complain a lot to him, which is something I do to anyone who will listen and he is so good about just listening to everything and sympathizing and taking my side. He's too good to me. I love him so much. I only hope he realizes this and only hope I can show him how much he means to me.

But I think that's enough for this entry. As always, comments are greatly appreciated. I love random comments or thoughts or helpful tips. And please read through my back posts and leave comments. You'll probably understand more of this post anyway if you do that.






User Comments: [16] [add]
Aelali
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commentCommented on: Sat Jul 30, 2005 @ 04:29pm
Love is fantastic isn't it? I think your parents are too strict. Your nineteen (?) and though you live under their roof, you should have more freedom then they award you. Have fun on your boyfriends birthday. Hopefully you can do all you plan to do!


commentCommented on: Mon Aug 01, 2005 @ 02:02am
Yeah, good luck with everything! That would really suck if you couldn't get to spend much time with your boyfriend on his birthday.

And I have to disagree with one thing...My boyfriend is the greatest guy in the world! wink



Anastasia_loves_BJ
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Blaez
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commentCommented on: Thu Aug 04, 2005 @ 06:47am
Wow... long, as usual xd 3nodding I think your parents should let you decide your life, as long as you don't walk into the house, noisily at 6 in the Morning... like mah sister...I stay up til then, so it doesn't bother me twisted


commentCommented on: Sun Aug 07, 2005 @ 08:51am
welcome to my world...I go through that everyday...



>_>;



.Sweetest~Nitemare.
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yuriku
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commentCommented on: Mon Aug 15, 2005 @ 04:16pm
well...you could do some extra chores around the house for a later curfew...but besides that i really don't know. You sound really mature and i think you're parents shouldn't take that for granted.


commentCommented on: Mon Aug 22, 2005 @ 09:06pm
Have you moved away at all from your parents house post-high school? It sounds as if they're still living in a world where you're the adolescent, and they have a say in what you do. It seems as if they haven't realized that their daughter is grown up, at an age where she can take care of herself, and that she is mature enough to make her own decisions. Sounds like a control issue to me.

My suggestion is to look into college grants, financial aid, school loans, etc, so that you can emancipate yourself from your parents' house. To show them that you can do this on your own and that you are not completely dependent on them will give them a new taste of reality. Not to sound like they're the worst parents in the world; on the contrary, they seem to love you so much that they're doing what they think is right and protecting you from the outside world, which they may or may not have experienced the bad firsthand themselves. I don't know you or them very well, so I don't know.

Otherwise, I say just tough it out until you can finally move to a dorm and become independent. It sounds like, to me, that you seem to feel uncomfortable about talking to your parents because you seem to only confide in your boyfriend, which is fine, but have you tried expressing your feelings to your parents? Perhaps sitting down and talking to them one on one about why you want to do this, and how special your bf is to you, might grant you some extra time. Tell them you'll stay home one night or come home earlier than normal to make up for it. If nothing works, all I can say is just do what you can with your time and make it the best birthday ever. Good luck. Sorry the post was so long.



Ailinea
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[.teh.shmexeh.]
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commentCommented on: Mon Sep 05, 2005 @ 09:41pm
Don't hate, appreciate. -Snaps in z-formation- xd


commentCommented on: Mon Nov 21, 2005 @ 09:23pm
I can't really relate to the whole boyfriend thing, but I agree with [almost] everyone else here on the fact that your parents are too strict. Even my parents are less strict than that, and I'm quite a bit younger than you.



Ryetsei
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frostywings
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commentCommented on: Sun Dec 04, 2005 @ 08:23am
hmm.

i understand how you feel, though the reason your parents are like this could be because they care for you.

maybe you could talk to them and try to convince them that you are old enough to take care of yourself.

or you could also offer to help them with something? i'm not sure how it is in your family... 3nodding


commentCommented on: Tue Mar 28, 2006 @ 09:03pm
Ouch. Parents can be rough. But they don't do it on purpose...I think. Anyway, I've learned, at least with my parents, just sitting down and getting everything out there in the open and being blunt about it gets things decided faster. Then you can be either rightously angry, or things may work out. biggrin



Silent Comet
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cool_person_1904
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commentCommented on: Sat Sep 16, 2006 @ 01:17am
Thats parents. If you really want to spend more time with your boyfriend, less rules, and longer curfews, try getting an apartment. Your 19, so legally, your parents can't stop you. Don't make it seem like your running away to your boyfriend, though. Start out slow. Look for an apartment, maybe find a roomate, to share the rent and to have some company. Thats just what I'd think. If you still want to live with your parents, you have to live under their rules. You are in their house, and they are probably just worried about you when you are out with your boyfriend. Thats how parents are. They mean well, sometimes they just, well, overdo it.


commentCommented on: Fri Dec 29, 2006 @ 04:18am
Wow.. my parents have never been strict on time (maybe cause we're asians.. there really isn't a set curfew) but they will want ot know where we are if we're coming home late..

Well, since your mom knows about your relationship, I'd hope she would let you spend time with your boyfriend, especially on his birthday!

Actually, I thought you would get your freedom (well not all, but most) when you're 18, right/ You're a legal adult by then, and you have the right to make your own decisions.. i know I will be when I turn 18... I hate not getting my privacy in this house, and I want to be independent.. as do most of my friends.. so we've all been discussing about renting an apartment together when we go to college.

LOL, I've heard enough how Jon's a great boyfriend ( lol, the way you say it, it's like you WANT someone to try and steal him away.. lol xd just kidding blaugh ) You know, i don't knwo what you got him for a present, but I've always found it hard to buy a guy something unless you know what he wants... I mean, general category would be clothing(mostly shirts), watches, wallets, something electronic.. but they're really general...

I was wondering, you really didn't feel nervous about meeting his parents/ i know I would have been scared about whether they would like me or not... but I think it would have turned out good, right/ wink



Starluvr
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Ella Amarilla
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commentCommented on: Fri Feb 23, 2007 @ 09:40pm
Wow.....you have it tough like me......my parents made me cry crying so hard one time that I actually moved out to live with my bf. I came back when we broke-up. I feel your pain.......Congrats on getting married heart biggrin


commentCommented on: Fri Mar 23, 2007 @ 05:59pm
Honestly if you have this issue move out or tell them how you feel and lay some ground rules for THEM you are 19 not a child anymore. there should not be a curfew unless you want one. On another note, you are to young still IMO to know really what love is. I thought i was in "love" at 15 i ran away to be with my BF we lived together on and off for 3 years mostly because i was in juvanile hall ( he had robbed my aunt and blamed it on me, and of course i took the blame) mean while he was out cheating only me with every chit he coudl find. and even getting me arrested in some cases but i was "blinded" by "love" so when i was 18 and i came home from baording school i went to find him. he was liveing with his GF of 8 months and her parents i was of course devistated at my loss. but i moved on and found a wonderful person i thought a few months later. We where married on our 1 year anniversery. we have 3 boys together and lead a simple life. but it is not what i had wanted for myself and he is not the person i wanted at all, and yet here we are. the point is "love" is not all its cracked up to be... at all. and it will push you to make supid decisions in your life. The last thing i woudl like to mention is you sound terribly self centerd and ungrateful. With things like " I want to be in my place early so I don't lose control with my roomies." so YOU dont lose control?....why woudl you need to control anyone? and "I could learn to hate my father" he is the only one you will ever have dont waste your time hateing. "my father has the gall " you LIVE in HIS house. do as i said tell him what your life plans are and if they cannot accpet that MOVE OUT, you shoudl be looking for an apartment or SOMETHING already anyway. everythign in your post is generally I,I,I me,ME,me but i dont see you makeing an attempt to help yourself out and make anyone else's life easier. Grow up move out and a live a life befor you decide omg this is the 6th person i dated and i am SO in LOVE!!! thats a fantasy girl you need to wake up.



IrishRain
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Eralf
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commentCommented on: Sat Apr 07, 2007 @ 07:55am
stare it must really suck that your parents are like that i feel your pain and im 16 my mom was like that i hope you can escape that soon well im happy your happy when your around you bf blaugh so anyway just thought i would leave a comments sense you poll said it^^


commentCommented on: Tue Mar 18, 2008 @ 01:09am
Sad.....



fyannakrum
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User Comments: [16] [add]
 
 
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