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Very Detailed Dreams of Not Dying.
I had a dream that was awful.
There was a house, and a forest, and inside the forest was a littler house.
Hard to describe, but full of cabinets.
The cabinets were filled with stuff, tons of random junk.
I do not know why, but, in the big house, I was being tortured.
Somehow, I escaped, and I ran to the little house.
I searched through the clutter to find something that I could kill myself with.
I knew I had to, because if I didn't, they would find me and torture me again.
I found a knife.
I poised it above my heart and prepared for eternal bliss,
and stabbed myself.
However, a piece of bone prevented it from doing any damage, so I tried again.
And again, when that didn't work.
I was filled with an overwhelming sense of loss.
All was lost.
I looked at the bloodless knife, then back out the window.
My torturers were fighting their way through the forest to come and get me.
That was when I woke up.
Surprisingly, that was not the only nightmare I have had of not dying.
And, unfortunately, the other is more disturbing.
I had a dream that I was in a University in Texas.
Perhaps for a Science Fair?
Anyway, after an escapade worthy of Indiana Jones, I discovered a pile of technological-looking rubble underneath the building.
I called reinforcements to the scene, and I left.
Hours or days later, I realized that the people I had called to help had actually rebuilt the wrecked mess.
After constructing it, they turned it on.
A giant clockwork mechanism controlled a metal arm large enough to sit on.
It moved slowly, but was clearly counting down to something.
After further testing, it was revealed that the seemingly harmless machine was a chemical bomb.
There was not enough time until detonation for everyone to escape.
So, everybody did their best to calm their fears and ready themselves for death.
I also did so.
I was so completely ready that I could almost imagine heaven.
However, they were herding all of the students into the building for some guise of safety, and I was a student.
But I refused to go.
I didn't want to die being crushed under hundreds of pounds of crumbling brick and cement!
I would rather go in a flash of heat and light and minimal pain.
So I sat on the giant mechanical clock hand, counting down the seconds we all had to live.
I overheard some man ask the one in charge, "Are you actually going to let her do this?"
He said, "If she's ready, more power to her. Maybe it doesn't hurt as bad if you're waiting for it."
I smiled, felt the gears tumble under me, getting closer to the end that I was ready for, and then they stopped.
Not in a good way.
The mechanism hadn't failed.
Instead, time had sort of frozen.
I couldn't believe it.
I was just going to sit here, waiting for time to restart?
Possibly forever?
I tried as hard as I possibly could to make the gears whirl again.
Even if only to die, just not to sit here in this wrongness.
I felt myself waking up, and I tried to return to my dream to make the bright, happy end finally come.
But it didn't.
I woke up feeling deprived.
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