My left eye glowed red, with the symbol that looked like a crow or some bird in it. I felt a lot of pain then. I fell to my knees, and one hand. My other hand was clutching onto the left part of my face. I screamed in shear agony. “Lelouch!” She cried leaning at my side. “Lelouch, what’s wrong!?” She helped me to my feet, but even then I couldn’t stand. She helped me into a chair, me leaning on her where I was hardly able to walk or stand up. “Damn it!” I mumbled. I couldn’t think or see straight. “Lelouch?” She asked me. “there’s no reason to worry.” I told her. “It happens whenever I take the mask off after a long period of time.” “Then why didn’t it happen yesterday when-” she started. “Because I was so angry to react to my left eye more visable.” I said. She was confused. She didn’t understand what was special about my eye. I would have to explain my past to her for her to understand. “When I was little…” I began, sorrow seemed to fill me up. “I was…alone. I had no one. No friends…and no family. I was always alone. Always wondering around in the world alone.” She listened closely to me as I spoke my story. “I knew very little about my family. I know my father never saw me. I don’t know if he left my mother when she was pregnant or not though. He was a mortal though. My mother,” I said. “As not to see me, made ma a present of my first mask! Even after that, though she took care of me as any other “caring” mother would, she still feared me. My face was my mother’s fear and loathing. When I was three years old she gave me a locket.” I paused briefly before continuing. “She had my cloths packed, and a small teddy bear packed in a bag.”
She was still confused but she had to understand everything to understand my power and the reasons I had it. “I asked her where we were going, and she said to see my grandma. But somehow I knew it wasn’t true deep down inside. I looked at the locket as we walked, and tried to read the inscription. But I had not yet learned to read or write.” I explained, looking at my hands. “Any time I asked her to disciper it she said now was not the time. Soon we came to a park where we sat to rest. I didn’t have my mask on though.” I glanced at the half white mask in the floor. “As I played, happily, I failed to realize one thing, that would change, and wound me forever.” I think she knew what had happened that had hurt me. “I picked out a flower for my mother….a rose. But, as I turned to give it to her…I realized…she was gone.” I said my voice betraying me as it started to show tears were coming. “I was alone. All I had left was a locket, my cloths, and bear. But also my anger, and tears. I sat on the bench where my mother had been sitting, and weeped while tears up the rose I had held to give my mom.” That women had never even been worthy of the title “mom”. Melissa reached out and pulled me into her arms. She layed me against her, and petted my head as I weeped. “Then a girl around my age came up and took my hand and then she asked ‘what’s the matter, little boy?’ Her mother came up as well and asked ‘Are you lost, little boy? Where’s your mother?’” I cried. “‘She’s abandoned me. She doesn’t love me.’ I told them. The girls mother, not knowing what I looked like, lifted my head up.” I said. I was growing to be angry at this point, full of rage. “When she did…she and her daughter screamed. The mother snatched her daughter away, and slapped me across the face. ‘AND IT’S NO WONDER WHY!!’ she yelled at me”I made a fist. “She stormed off. Leaving me in tears. I knew…I knew why she had slapt me. She was afraid and discussted by my face. I reached into the bag my mom had packed me, and took out my bear.” I said. “It was my only friend, and companion. It couldn’t walk, nor talk. But it could confort me. I hugged it close, and weeped even harder as my right cheer throbbed in pain. Sitting for hours thinking how could my mother abandon me? How could she leave me to starve? To reliy on myself to live when I was so small? To fined off on my own? How could my Fae mother leave me to die like this?” Melissa looked at me. She understood even better now that she knew what my mother was. Fae were extremely beautiful women. But a fae and mortal didn’t always turn out right when it came to reproduction. My face being deformed…she knew…was the result of my fae mother and mortal father not turning out right. My half heart of a demon and angel…and my deformed face…was the result of there reproduction.
“I looked in the bag again, and my mothers first present to me: the mask. A mother’s fear and loathing. I placed it in the backpack, put it on my back, held my bear close, and started trying to find a way home. But while wondering around I came to realize…I didn’t know my way home!” I cried out. Rage filled me up. “My mother, knew I wouldn’t know how to get home where I was so small! I was alone in the world! I hand NO ONE! I walked the god be damned streets, being yelled and slapt at because of my appearance! I took the damn slaps! I took the beatings! I knew my mother wouldn’t care if I got hurt! For she had abandoned me! I was and would always be a mother’s or anyone’s FEAR AND LOUTHING!” She pulled me close, and held me as close to her as she could manage. “Soon I came upon someone so dicusted by my appearance to me he took his sword, and gave me a big gash in my arm.” I said. “Bleeding, and wounded I struggled away from town. Losing conciousnes from lack of blood, and struggling so much as to stand. ‘My life’s going to end’ was all I was and could think. Everything had gone blurry, and I collapsed, and I knew then I wouldn’t live. Truly I didn’t care anymore. I was better off dead. No one wanted nor loved me. They wouldn’t even notice I was dead.”
Now she had a new question…how was it that I was alive if I had been hurt so bad? “When I woke up,” I continued, “I lay in a bed. It was warm and confrotable. I could hear a fire burning in the fireplace. I didn’t understand. Was this heaven? Or was it hell? Or a mere dream?” I asked myself. It all had appeared that way during that time. “I, still clutching my bear, got out of the bed, and went to look around. I was in a palace...I knew that much. I wondered into a study..." This was where things got better for me….for the time. “I see you finally decided to wake up.’ A voice greeted me. I looked to the desk and found where Jareth sat.” I said. She remembered Ana blabbing about Jareth and me mentioning to her. “He told me I had been unconscious for three days, but I was fine. He decided to teach me so I cold get somewhere in life. I asked him to deciper the lockets inscription…” “And…” Melissa encouraged me. “He deciphered it.” I said. “He then handed me the locket after words. I left the room without a word. I stayed in my room the entire day, crying. Jareth left me be. I spent the next few days with him as he taught me much. Must, reading, writing, everything…even subduction. Jareth became my only friend. My only companion.” I said. “One day while wondering around alone, without my mask, things got bad for me. It was early in the morning, and people were starting to come out. While I was walking a plane crashed in town. As it came crashing towards the ground I swore I heard a women’s voice call to me. The voice sounded like it was coming from the plane.”
She stared at me confused. Obviously she didn’t understand the voice thing….she would though. “I felt complied to go see where the plane crashed…so I did. The piolet was dead when I got there. But…I found a capsule in the plane storage, while searching for the voice. I placed my hand on it, and in a burst of bright light the capsule came open.” I said. “A green haired, yellow eyed girl around my age, was completely tied up, she looked at me, and fell to the ground. I didn’t understand why she was tied up, but as I heard voice’s approaching I knew it wasn’t good.” Yes of course a girl tied up in a capsule couldn’t be good. “I hid but was discovered by the military. They grabbed the girl, and slammed me into a wall. ’How unfortunate. If you weren’t at the crash site, you would’ve lived. But since you came into contact with that girl, we can’t let you go.’ the commander told me. But he also said I had not reason to live because of my uglyness.” I told her. “What is the military planning? Who is that girl?’ I said to them. I demanded answers.”
I’m not sure anyone would blame me for wanting answers like I did. “You have no right to know. You did give us a good fight, though.’ He said to me. He raised his gun then said, “but…your future just ended.’” I said. “As I heard the trigger get pulled, I looked away and close my eyes tightly then I heard the girl scream. “DON’T KILL HIM!’ I opened my eyes up enough to see her shield me, and take the bullet to the forehead. I caught her as she fell into my arms, bleeding, and unconscious…if not already dead.” I never did understand why she had saved me. I don’t think I ever would find out. “She shielded me. Why? “Now…it’s…you turn.’ what was all this about this girl that they captured her, and then killed her? I told them they were rotten. All of them. Was this it for me!? Helpless…unable to do anything!?” I said. “I fell to my hands and knees. Then that girl’s hand moved, and took mine.” Melissa was surprised. This part had scared me too. She was dead! There was not chance she could of survived! “In a bright light it seemed I was in a different dimention. Everything around me was electric blue with white strikes of lighting. Then I heard a women’s voice. ‘What….what the heck!? Who is this!’ I cried ‘You don’t want to…end it here…’ I heard her say to me. I was falling, and I saw a girl with her back to me, naked, she turned her head towards me. “Is it that girl? No way!…What is this?’ I thought. “it seems you have a reason to live…can you live if you have power?’” I paused to take a short breath. “‘This is a contract. I’ll give you power if you grant a wish of mine.’ She said. ‘If you accept this contract, you will live among humans not following the reasons they follow. A different providence. A different time. A different life.’ She said to me. I saw a man standing, staring out a window. ‘That is…the emperor!’ I said. ‘The power of the kind will isolate you. The mythology…the rebirth…the connection of Ragnorok? If you’re prepared to face that…’ She said.”
This was the name the girl had given the power…it was actually called by a different name: Geass. “‘Prepared? Very well. I’ll accept that contract! I accept the terms of your contract!’ I told her. Everything around me was back to normal. The girl had let go of my hand, and lay motionless again. I started to laugh a little despite the pain in my left eye.” I said. “What should a boy do if he hates humanity…society?’ I asked them ‘are you out of your mind?!’ They cried taken back by what I had said. ‘What’s wrong?’ I asked them” Now I would tell her what was so special about my eye. “‘Aren’t you going to shoot me? I’m only a hidous inhuman being after all.’ I told them” I said this with a chuckle. “‘Or did you realize…that you can only shoot…if you are prepared to be shot?’ I told them. ‘I, Erik (Lelouch) Phoenix Legrange, order you!’ I said to them revealing my left eye, which I had had covered. They made eye contact with me…direct eye contact. ‘You can all…DIE!” My angel stared at me in her arms. She hadn’t expected me to order them to die. I think this was why my hands smelt of, apparently, death. “They started to laugh, and trembled a little. Then they stood up straight. I stared at them with a blank look. They took the gun’s and pointed them at there necks. ‘understood’ the leader had said.” I said to her. “All at once they pulled the trigger and there guns, and there blood splatterd all over the place, some of it hitting me in the face as the bang sounds ecoed in my ears. Ever since that day...I've been lying. Living a lie. The lie of living. Lying that I'm "alive.". My name is a lie...My background is a lie...so many lies. I was board by an unchaning world...yet I couldn't give up my life either. But now I have it. Power. That's why...I'll crush light. I'll crush those who hurt me."
to be continued in chapter 42...
