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*The scene begins with Chris standing alone in a room*
Chris: HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DUDES AND DUDETTE, Chris here coming to ya live from the Madhouse, today’s the big day where all of our contestants will be coming. I don’t know about you guys but i can’t wait to see the dumba-
*the door behind Chris opens up to show Andrew standing there wearing only boxers and a fedora hat, looking extremely sleepy.*
Andrew: who the hell are you talking to Chris?
*The scene zooms out to show that Chris has been standing in front of a bathroom mirror the entire time*
Chris: I wasn’t talking at all your hearing must be off.
Andrew: i’m pretty sure that my hearing isn’t off and i’m pretty sure you were talking just now.
Chris: I’m pretty sure your an idiot
Andrew: and i’m pretty sure that if you don’t get outta the bathroom right now i’m gonna go to your room and do there what i was gonna do in the toilet here.
Chris: Don’t even think about it man.
Andrew: Then get out of here
Chris: fine, fine i’m going, but let me ask you this why are you wearing a fedora?
Andrew: Cause i always wear a fedora.
Chris: Even to bed?
Andrew: Doesn’t everybody?
*The scene shifts to the 1st floor where Chef is busy working in kitchen cooking, Andre& Mika walk in and jump on the counter next to him*
Chef: WHOA, you scared me there i didn’t hear you guys come in.....wait a minute why am i talking to cats, maybe Chris is right maybe i am losing it.
*He looks at the cats for a few moments and then smiles to himself*
Chef: Oh but how could i not talk to cute kitties like you guys, who wants to be petted.
*Chef reached out his hand and was about to pet Mika when his hand was batted outta the way by Andre*
Chef: why you, i just wanted to pet your sister now let me.
*The following moments contained Chef attempting to pet Mika only to have his hand batted out of the way*
Chef: Why can’t I pet Mika
???:Cause we only let Andrew pet us
Chef: wait who said that?
???: Down here
*Chef looked down to find the source of the voice only to see the cats*
Chef: Psh, musta been my imagination, cause everyone knows cats can’t talk.
Andre: Oh but we can.
Mika: Ya Andrew taught us.
*Chef looked at the cats and then tried to recall anything that he had eaten that would cause him to hallucinate like this*
Andre: We know what your thinking
Chef: OH GAWD YOUR PSHYCIC TOOOO
Mika: No, we just know that your thinking your going crazy cause we’re talking to you.
Chef: Ya that’s basically all i’m thinking right now.
Andre: Ya well you’re not and we can actually talk.
Mika: Thanks to Andrew’s strict teaching regime.
Andre: Ya no kibbles till we could speak Latin underwater.
Chef: YOU CAN SPEAK LATIN UNDERWATER!!!!!
Mika: Psh no we just made him think we could.
Chef: how
Andre: he doesn’t know any Latin
Chef: Oh... ok then.
*At that moment Chris walked into the kitchen and looked at Chef*
Chris: Dude are you talking to Andrew’s cats?
Chef: Ya you’d never believe it the idiot taught his cats to speak.
Chris: ...................riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigghhhtt
Chef: No i’m serious say something Andre....Mika
*Andre and Mika just sat there staring blankly at Chef*
Chris: Dude you really gotta get outta the kitchen more often
Chef: Chris, dude i’m serious.
Chris: and i’m serious about you needing help
*With that Chris left the room leaving Chef slightly defeated, he then looks at the cats who are shaking their heads*
Andre: Chef, Chef, Chef, you can’t go around telling strangers that we can talk
Chef: BUT YOU TOLD ME AND I’M A STRANGER TO YOU.
Mika: Well you were until we fought
Chef: BUT ALLYOU DID WAS KICKED ME DOWN
Andre: Ya but taht’s in the past and now we’re friends
Chef: I hate you soo much right now
Mika: Ok whatevers, can we have kibbles now
Chef: No
Andre: Please
Chef: No
Mika razz retty Please
Chef: NO WAY IN HELL
Andre&Mike: Pretty Pretty Please
Chef:OK OK JUST SHUT UP
*Near the front of the MadHouse Andrew and Chris stood waiting for the contestants to arrive*
Andrew: Are they almost here yet?
Chris: I dunno?
Andrew: How bout now?
Chris: I don’t know
Andrew: How bout now?
Chris: OK THATS IT
*Chris turns around and starts strangling Andrew*
Chris: I DON’T CARE WHAT THE MAN IN CHARGE THINKS YOU ARE NOT GONNA BE ON THIS SHOW ONCE I’M DONE WITH YOU.
Andrew:*while choking* GAR ZEY ERE ET?
Chris: I DON’T F*****G KNOW DAMMIT
???: Wow no wonder this place is called the Madhouse.
*Chris immediately releases Andrew to confront the witness*
Chris: Who the heck are you?
???: I’m Loyde Reed one of the contestants, but you can just call me Loyde, now who are the other losers-i mean contestants, are they here yet
Chris: did you just call the other contestants losers
Loyde: no i don’t think i did
Chris: I pretty sure you did
Loyde: Nope definitely didn’t.
Chris: You did.
Loyde: Didn’t
Chris: Did
Loyde: Did
Chris: didn’t
Loyde Ok fine whatever you say
Chris: GOD DAMMIT I CAN’T TAKE THIS MUCH LONGER
*In the background a snickers bar drops down beside Andrew who immediately notices it and goes to pick it up*
Andrew: YAY SNICKERS
???:HAHAHA YOU FELL FOR IT
*a person dropped down behind Andrew, and with a swiftness achieved over years of training put his forefingers and rammed them up Andrew’s butt*
Andrew: OH SWEET JESUS IN A PEANUT *as he went sailing through the air clutching his butt*
???: Ah my flawless technique *Andrew lands in the flower beds* 1000 years of pain.
Loyde: And you are?
???: Name’s Will, super ninja extraordinaire, and ex-chocoholic.
*Andrew rejoins the group rubbing his butt*
Andrew: You mean chocoholic right
Will: No ex
Andrew: Then why’d you eat that snickers bar?
*Will looks at the half eaten snickers bar in his hand drops to his knees and cries*
Will: Nooooooooooooo, i haven’t touched chocolate for at least a minute.
Andrew: i feel your pain buddy I’m a chocolate milk addict myself.
Will: *Sniff* how do you deal with your addiction.
Andrew: I have a hip flask that i can take a swig from at any time.
*Andrew pulls out a massive canister, unscrews it, and takes a sip, and then drops it*
Andrew: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I’M OUT.
Loyde: Ok then....
Chris: This is probably the best part of my job, what’s that noise?
*A roaring is heard in the distance, and continues to get louder and louder until a motorcycle breaks through the front gates with two riders on it*
???1:CARTER IS IN THE HOUSE
???2:HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
*Carter drifts the bike to a stop in a flowerbed full of roses sending the other rider flying off and through a window in the house, Carter then gets off the bike and heads toward the group assembled in front of which*
Andrew:*holds up a sign that says “Pwned”*
Loyde: *holds up a sign that says “WOOT”*
Carter: Yo how’s it going guys?
Andrew: besides my new inability to poop good
Loyde: Meh
Will: It was better before you got here
Chris: no wonder this show is called the madhouse
*Chef walks out of the house carrying the body of ???2, Mika&Andre following suit*
Chef: Who the hell is this guy
Carter: That would be Rygeor
Rygeor: hi~~~~
*Chef suddenly drops Ryegor and falls to his knees*
Chef: NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU MY GARDEN WHAT HAPPENED.
Loyde: Well the crater over there is where Andrew landed and the bike pit is Carter’s.
*Chef instantly grabs Carter and Andrew by the necks and starts choking them*
Chef: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY PETUNIA’S AND ROSES
Loyde: there sure is alotta choking on this show....
Will: i know right.
???:What the heck is going on here?
*The group turns to see too girls and a man walking towards them*
Chris: Let me guess Smith, Jill, and Alexandra?
Jill: You are correct
Smith:Yo
Alexandra:..........YOU’LL NEVER TAKE MEEEEEEEE
*Alexandra turns and makes a run fo the gate*
Chris: CHEF WE GOTTA RUNNER!
Chef: ON IT!
*In one smooth motion Chef drops Carter and Andrew, pulls a rifle from under his apron, loads it and snipes Alexandra down*
Andrew:*holds up a sign that says “Pwned”*
Loyde: *holds up a sign that says “WOOT”*
Will:*hold’s up a sign with the TF2 Lol face on it*
Carter: *hold’s up a sign that has to be censored*
Loyde: Where did you get that sign from?
Carter: Ebay
Loyde: That make total sense.
Chris: Chef i think she’s still going
Chef: I got her i got her.
*Chef walks over to Alexandra who is attempting to crawl her way out of the compound, grabs her by the leg and drags her back*
Alexandra: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, YOU”LL NEVER TAKE MEEEEEEEEE ALIVEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, I’LL BE THE FIRST TO DIE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
*Chef drags her past the group where she continues to yell until a thump is heard then complete silence*
Chris: ooooooooooookkkkaaaay then, *turning to the group*, if you haven’t already guessed you’ve all just left the real world and entered the MadHouse, as a refresher you’ll competing to win this 10 million dollar house, and a large cash prize as well, the winner gets it all the losers get nothing so without further delay (or incidents) let games begin.
Andrew: Are they here yet?
*Chris throws Andrew down and begins beating him sensless*

EEEEEEEEExcellent, the first episode is up and the wheels have been set in motion, hope you enjoy it and if you don't mind imma gonna go dance like no one's watching.