dear stupid coworker,
do you want this job? all you do is talk about going on interviews, you show up 10 minutes late when you open and you don't listen. you sign off on tasks with out doing them and you leave tasks both unsigned and not done with out telling me or leaving a note. if you do not have time to finish your work before you trot off please tell me. i'm sick of having to check your work, it means i have less time to do my own work. you have also said that you do not care about company policy and have shown as such. you fill animal food bowls your way which wastes food, wastes my time and will get us all in trouble. so, do you want this job? you b***h about not getting enough hours but every time you get more hours you can't work them. then you talk about quitting because you're not getting more hours. catch a clue! if you want more hours make yourself more available.
dear new coworker,
your nicknames are barbie and princess. these are not terms of endearment... this job is very dirty, most of it is cleaning up poop of some sort or picking up dead things. yes we do get to play with cute animals but there are plenty of "not cute" ones that still need care. you must learn to suck it up, grow a back bone and stop complaining. yes, the crickets are probably the worst smelling thing next to a dead body but please just get over it. in time you will be used to it and complaining isn't going to make it smell better. hold your breath.
also, please stop trying to steal my shifts! you don't like getting wet so friday mornings are not a good time for you. this is when we get new fish, trust me you will get soaked. you also need to work fast and not complain, two things you can't seem to do. you can't stand around and chat about your super cute cat when fish need to be put in tanks, they don't appreciate it. your ability to get drunk with your boyfriend on friday night is less important that thousands of dollars worth of living fish.
dear moron customer,
"duuuuuuh uh can uh hamsters uh eat like uh hamburgers cuz it's like both ham right?" i hope you're just on drugs and weren't born that stupid. that is a hideously dumb thing to ask, you fail at life. it was a good thing you called and where not there to see my horrified reaction.
dear foreign customer,
speaking very fast in russian at me is just going to make me say "uhhh wut?" i only speak english and little spanish. this is the US... we mainly speak english here. i'm sorry i can't help you. did you really have to yell at me and call me the one russian word i do understand- the word for b***h? you're a b***h for assuming we'd all magically know russian. ******** off.
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