I felt like i hated you for so long. Till i read your journal entry, really. It made me see more of you and made me wish i could figure myself out more. Figure out why i am the way i am. Why im the person everyone wants but hates at the same time. It's given me something really big to think about. Something thats going to take me a lot of time to sort through. Because since Febuary...Since i stopped talking to you I felt so damn confused about myself, about my life, about why the hell i do somethings.
Why i used to cut, why i got attached to you, or to Travis....Why i can be such a terrible person.
You made me think about everything i've done. My past. The present, what might happen later on in life.
It may make me a better person to think about this. But it may throw me back down into my hole of depression. If it does it may be good for me. But i may ruin a lot of things again.
Idk why im really writing this. But now i can't stop thinking at all. Its messing with my head. and crying sounds really nice. Not that it fixes anything. Oh well...
Im not sure about this hahaha....
don't comment it please....
Drop-Dead-Dinosaur · Sun Jul 19, 2009 @ 01:18am · 0 Comments |