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do i seem like im living a good life? other than being an army brat that everything is great? none of you realize how screwed up my life is....it will take me a few jurnal enteries to get it through. i mean... i KNOW people have worse situations than me but i dont know them personally. well first ill explain about my biological father. he left my mom and i when i was about 1 1/2 then he thinks he can waltz back into my life 10 yrs later with a new wife AND a son. then when i was 7 or 8 or 9 my mom got married to my ex-stepfather. Ritcherd Houard Rufert stay away from him UNDERSTAND? he physically abused my mom and mentally abused me (probably adding to my possible mental disease bipolar) to tell you the trouth i dont know if im a virgin. thank fully after around a year my mom got a divorse. then we move to north dakota ( some of the happiest years of my life) then i moved here. i know that dosent seem like much but those are the 2 things i feel like i can tell total strangers. to tell you the truth my best friends have only broken the first 2 of the 20 berrers ive put around myself. of the things you used to know about me....do i seem like a girl that would attempt suicide....?

Posted by: Itazura_Kai Fri Feb 23, 2007 @ 02:39am

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Damey-kunn
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Commented on: Fri Feb 23, 2007 @ 04:30am


	I'm sorry to hear that... I can'y relate though, I'm sorry... I have to say my life was, and is much better than what you have xplained here... I simply don't know what to say except that suicide is not the answer... I will speak religiously right now lololol... Sorry, I luv God sweatdrop Suicide is not the answer, because by killing yourself you only show how weak you are, plus not to mention hurting all of the ones that care about you... Do u want to scarr them for life? God also says, "For those who have suffered, you shall live an eternity happily" which means all your pains and griefs will be rewarded in heaven... I'm jjust saying this... I suffered mental abuse in 4th-6th grade... From my mom... friends who never backed me up... and other classmates... So maybe I can relate a little... I'm also a pacifest who would never hurt someone, or fight... sad Well... I'm telling you this because I dont want you to wind up like others who killed themselves... Remember, If there is at least one person who cares about you in the worls, then that person already makes it worth living. smile

Commented on: Fri Feb 23, 2007 @ 09:51pm


	please dont think im attention starved. im not. i just want to knock down the "barriers" smile

Itazura_Kai
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Poisoned_71898
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Commented on: Sun Feb 25, 2007 @ 07:21pm


	I'm sorry...I agree suicide ain't the answer never is..it jst proves to the ppl who messed u up they won. Hell I wen tthru some stuff..suicides, heart attacks..abuses..diabetes...deaths after deaths..even one of a broken heart....I can't even drive a car5 cuz I'm such a chicken....okay so u have barriers around u so do I and thankfully u have friends who have broken some of them, ^_^ I found some great people who broke mine down too(maria crystal chantell whitney maia...Daniel greg. I laugh with a real laugh thanks to them)...tho I still cry at night wishing for it all to go away(or to take me to my youngest years before 1998 and keep me there) or ask god to take me now...then ask him to hold on, I still have some life in me, I met my friend crystal who seems a little like me and she's sometimes depressed and wen I hear her say " thank u Tori u made my day, I WAS having a bad one but now I feel better" I feel like I have a reason...I'm not the greatest person to come to with problems but hell I can TRY n make my friends happy..I try making them happier than me. Oh n my6 love life..NOT as great as u think it would be... haha..guys n Tori...sigh I can like someone but not be liked back..or jst NOT liked... oh n to Damey-san Don't say sorry ^_^ u LOVE God that's nothng to be sorry for ^_^...darn u made tears come frm my EYES!!!!!!!! lol hahah..but not bad ones .. Peaces to u all luffles frm the token mex!!!!!!! lol...slumps to cleaning!!!!

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