i'm getting sorta sick of this life. well, i guess that's a terrible way to put it. haha, i don't want people worrying about me or anything, because i don't want this to sound like my typical, "i'm depressed and need lots of help and an excuse to get outta this dark and miserable room" sort of entry, cuz that's not it at all. i mean, i'm getting sort of sick of how people are never around for me.
yes, i'm co-dependent. it's not my most pleasant characteristic, but what can i say? i hate being by myself. but the thing is, everyone either is getting on my nerves, is busy, grounded, or out of town! and i'm getting sort of tired of it.
in other news, one of my best friends, albert, suffered NO memory loss and will prolly be back home before the end of summer! ah, i have so much to tell that guy, i can't even express how happy i am. not to mention songs of death are no longer playing over and over on my computer. he's coming back! i'm ******** ecstatic right now!!!
but i still have this lingering sense of abandonment. which i will get into in a drunken depression some night (haha, or sober one. it just sounds more dramatic when i think of how i used to write drunkenly depressed. haha)
ah, i wanna get out in the world. i wanna be the type of person who has hundreds of people outside of my funeral because the church was too small for all of them. i want the biggest party. i want people to really know me and love me. but i guess i should stop expecting so much of this lame life that i lead. at least i'm having some sort of fun now!
 the_forgotten_thought · Mon Jun 28, 2010 @ 01:02am · 0 Comments |
